College

---

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september 2014 | mtparent.com

montana parent growing up under the big sky

from birth to college

Think

College

parents need to prepare, whether it’s now, next year ... or in 18 years

406.414.1644 :: bdhg.org/patientportal

YOUR HEALTH RECORDS ARE NOW IN YOUR HANDS. If you’re a current Bozeman Deaconess Health Group patient, you can now access important information in your medical record, request an appointment, and communicate with your medical office team online, with the click of a button, anytime—day or night. Stop in or call your Bozeman Deaconess Health Group clinic for secure registration to our patient portal. We’ll be happy to help. And, you’ll be happy to gain access!

Zachary Meyers, MD Board Certified: Family Medicine

Holly Omar, MD Board Certified: Obstetrics and Gynecology

bdhg.org

Welcome New Physicians We would like to welcome Drs. Zachary Meyers and Holly Omar, who are now seeing patients at Bozeman Deaconess Health Group. Zachary Meyers, MD, joins Bozeman Deaconess Family Medicine. Dr. Meyers graduated from Oregon Health & Science University in Portland and completed his internship and residency at Montana Family Medicine Residency where he was co-chief resident. Holly Omar, MD, joins Bozeman Deaconess Women’s Specialists. Dr. Omar graduated from the University of Nevada School of Medicine, then moved to Texas Tech University Health Sciences Center for a residency in obstetrics and gynecology, where she was co-chief resident and was named Outstanding First Year Resident. Please join us in welcoming these two new physicians. Call to schedule your appointment with either of them today.

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

Zachary Meyers, MD Bozeman Deaconess Family Medicine 935 Highland Blvd. Suite 2200

406.414.5700

Holly Omar, MD

Bozeman Deaconess Women’s Specialists 905 Highland Blvd. Suite 4440

406.414.5140

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28 BACKPACKING TO DEVIL’S GLEN

Think

College

29 SNACK TIME 30 SKIP THE SODA

11 THINK COLLEGE

32 FALL HARVEST

14 LETTING GO YOUR CHILD MAY BE READY FOR COLLEGE, BUT ARE YOU READY FOR HIM TO LEAVE?

34 DIAGNOSING CELIAC DISEASE: WHEN IT’S MORE THAN A TUMMY ACHE

15 TACKLING THE COLLEGE APPLICATION

36 LOCKED AND DIMLY LIT

16 GETTING INTO A TOP 25 COLLEGE… YES YOU CAN

37 CORNER ON HEALTH: PLANNING FOR THE UNEXPECTED

17 YEAR 13 IN THE YELLOWSTONE A CAREER EDUCATION PROGRAM FOR MONTANA’S YOUTH

COLUMNS

18 THE ONLY WAY OUT IS THROUGH 20 CONVERTING EMPTY BEDROOMS INTO USEFUL EMPTY-NEST ROOMS 21 THE (COLLEGE) TALK

38 ARE WE THERE, YET? DATE NIGHT EDITION 39 BACK TO SCHOOL, BACK TO HOMEWORK: 10 TIPS TO HELP YOUR STUDENT SUCCEED 40 seven STEPS TO IMPROVE YOUR RELATIONSHIP 42 MOMOIRS

22 Montana Money Magic: Helping Montana Students Save for the Future 23 Scoping for Scholarships: They’re Out There; Start Looking 24 TIPS TO ENSURE A SUCCESSFUL COLLEGE FRESHMAN YEAR

44 TEACHING SLEEP 101: MAINTAINING HEALTHY SLEEP AT COLLEGE 46 WHAT’S YOUR CHILD’S TEACHER’S IQ? 48 THE FAMILY BUSINESS: SHERRI NASSAR, RENEW SKIN CARE

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54 WHAT’S UP BOZEMAN 60 WHAT’S UP HELENA

NOT ONLY ARE WE ALWAYS THERE WITH GUIDANCE AND SUPPORT, BUT

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Keep a copy in your car so you always have the coupons on hand. Follow our quick reference guide for on-the-go help: 7 Learning RX: Save $79 on professional testing 21 Dish: Free Hopper upgrade 25 Conover Fence: Free gate 58 Antoinettes: Free loyalty gift with any styling/product purchase 58 & 59 Bozeman Deals 61 Helena Deals 62 Mama’s Got a New Bag Contest

49 PARENTING SINGLE

26 STAYING PHYSICAL IN COLLEGE 27 ASK ANNIE: SAVING FOR COLLEGE TUITION

WHAT’S UP MONTANA

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50 MOVIE LOVERS TRIBUTE TO ROBIN WILLIAMS

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To qualify: • • • •

Be between the ages of 16-19 What edto? Be attending high school in Montana in you g ationone of six, participating geographic regions Money for edpuecnses! x related eng students Complete a financial education program articipati ortunity to P Meet income eligibility opp have the atch on # of people in household

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

Annual family income less than or equal to:

$21,256.50 $28,693.50 $36,130.50 $43,567.50 $51,004.50 $58,441.50 $65,878.50 $73,315.50

Stude who save nts $ through th450 program c e a earn the n maximum m of $1,350a. tch

o-1 m earn a 3-t nal savings. o rs e p ir the

Find out how you can start saving at

SmartAboutCollege.org

or call our outreach manager for your county:

Allen Heisler (406) 771-5136 Glacier, Toole, Pondera, Cascade, Choteau, Teton

For families/households with more than 8 people, add $7,437 for each additional person. Additional eligibilty requirements exist. Please contact us at (877) COLG4ME to learn more.

Montana Money Magic is funded by a grant received through Montana DPHHS.

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Think

College

editor’s voice WRITTEN BY LEIGH RIPLEY

Whenever I meet someone with a teenager, I can’t help grilling them about how they handle parenting their high school- or college-aged kids. The biggest questions I have are about letting go: How do you just let them drive away from the house when they get their license? What do you do when they accidentally butt dial you from college at 1 a.m. on a Tuesday night and all you can hear are screaming adolescents and house music? Listen, I know what I did in high school and college… and I can’t share most of it with you because it would be very incriminating, and most likely change any opinion you may have of me. What I can tell you is that it’s a miracle I survived and, even more so, that my parents survived (and still speak to me today). So how did a good kid (me) morph into the spawn of Satan (teenage me)? Hormones, at least that’s what I think. Once a child becomes possessed by hormones, the natural progression is for them to start pulling away from you. This is supposed to happen. Our job is to raise our kids; prepare them to live their own life when the time comes. We’re there to teach them everything we can and provide as many opportunities as possible. Our kid’s job is to develop their own personality (argue with you), explore the world and experiment without you (date, hang out with friends, engage in bad behavior and make poor choices) and, eventually, go out into the world and do something productive (obtain shelter and get a job).

A friend of mine put it best, “That sweet little face you see today will grow into a hormonal, defiant teenager. Believe me, you will want them to leave. And if you’re really lucky, and they graduate and move back to town, college will have sucked every hormone out of that kid and you just might become friends.” Now I realize that some kids actually mature without the excessive drama. I know two families, both with three girls, whose high school kids are amazing: playing sports, first chair in the band, president of the celibacy club, five hours of homework a night, volunteering for Montana Conservation Corps (you know who you are). This is what I want my kids to be like. These kids I’m writing about will most likely get into great colleges, actually go to class and study, and graduate in four years. My kids? If my mother’s motto holds any truth, I’ll get what’s coming to me. You know, the whole, “You just wait until you have a daughter exactly like you.” So what’s the secret? I’ve asked, and there is no answer. Try to be the best parent you can be. Send your kids out into the world and hope for the best. They are humans; they are fallible and, most often, the best way to learn is from their mistakes. I wish the best of luck to all of you with teenagers. May they be the president of the celibacy club and get into an Ivy League school, on scholarship no less. For the rest of you, I’ll meet you at the bar, grey hair, wrinkles and all. mp

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montana parent growing up under the big sky

from birth to college

September 2014 | mtparent.com

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Think

College

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Y RAPH LLEY PHOTOG

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PHOTO E. KE

College

Letting Go

Your child may be ready for college, but are you ready for him to leave? WRITTEN BY CARRIE HOOK

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As the mother of three teenagers, I have spent a lot of time locked in my own bathroom. When they were young, it was an escape strategy. As they got older and sassier, it was for their own protection. Now I soak in the tub and think about what I will do when they are no longer yelling “Mom?!” throughout the house. Sometimes I can’t wait for the quiet, but mostly I can’t imagine what I will do with myself. Last fall my daughter started college in a town about three hours away. Before she left, we talked about study habits, budgeting and not drinking neon-colored drinks that someone has concocted in a bathtub. She mastered the nod and smile, and I knew she was ready. If your child has navigated high school, can order their own food at a restaurant, wash a load of laundry and stay home alone without the aid of a 911 dispatcher, then they are ready too.

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It was me who wasn’t ready. I was not prepared to have one of my blips fall completely off my radar. Where was she? What if she got sick? What if she slept too much and missed every class? What if something happened to her? Some of the best advice I got when I was freaking out was from Finding Nemo: Marlin: “I promised I would never let anything happen to him.” Dory: “Hmm. That’s a funny thing to promise.”

September 2014 | mtparent.com

I had to let things happen to her. She had to learn the way we all learn—by living. If you try something and it feels successful, you will try it again. If you try something and the results are bad enough, you won’t try it again (this is how I know about drinks concocted in bathtubs). A toddler learns that sticking things way up their nose has consequences. Unpleasant consequences. As teens, on their own, they are still learning through experience. Things will happen to them. This is hard on parents because the stakes seem higher. We worry that, without our constant guidance, they will flunk out and end up unemployed and homeless. We worry that they will make bad choices that will have long lasting effects. It’s hard to send them into the world and hope they make it. But what choice do you have other than to let things happen to them? They will have heartache and elation and you will be forced to watch from the sidelines. My older son is a senior in high school and I am trying to prepare for blip number two to fall off the radar. Prepared or not, I will still cry when I pull out of that dorm parking lot leaving my child behind. I will still walk by his room and notice the lack of smell and cry. I know I will. I will cling to him this final year knowing that, after this year, our relationship will never be the same. But I will let things happen to my little Harpo and know that we are both as ready as we are going to get. mp

Marlin: “What?” Dory: “Well, you can’t never let anything

14

happen to him. Then nothing would ever happen to him. Not much fun for little Harpo.”

Carrie Hook is the program manager for the Parent Place at Thrive in Bozeman. Carrie is a Montana native and the mother of three teenagers.

Think

Tackling the

College Application WRITTEN BY STEPHEN MICHAUD

If you’re the parent of a high school senior, this month marks not just the start of another school year but also the start of potentially significant changes in your child’s life. If they’re headed to college, you’re about to begin the application journey. There seems to be a toss-up on who’s more anxious about what lays ahead, high school seniors or their parents. So what’s your role in this process? How can you help, while still encouraging independence and initiative? These are good questions with complex answers. As parents we want our kids to step up, take charge and move forward, but we must also remember that they are teenagers who developmentally aren’t necessarily ready to handle this application process alone. You can help. The most important thing parents need to remember during this process is that their student should be “driving the train,” not them. How do you let go, while still providing some needed structure and responsibility? That being said, encouragement and structure can go hand in hand. Here are some tips: »»Know what colleges your student is considering. Listen to their choices.

»»Ask open-ended questions – this will give you more information and help you understand where they are in the process. Your student will learn to be flexible, organized and persistent if they are allowed to work through some of the inherent challenges of completing an application. It helps your student gain confidence and clarity when they take ownership of this process. It’s their voice that must be read and understood. »»Arrange for 15- to 20-minute weekly meetings with your student to check in and keep track of the ongoing progress. »»Share this article and other college admissions materials with your student. Students must be aware of all the detailed specifics, such as deadlines, school choices, how their high school handles their part of this application process, how and when they will begin their college essays and what tests they need to take (SAT, ACT, subject tests).

Here is a list of some student responsibilities: »»Begin early – summer and early fall are ideal times to begin the application. »»Know deadlines – what entrance option will be chosen? Regular, EA, ED, Deferral? Ideally, applications should be completed well before (three weeks) the designated deadline.

»»Know if colleges require or offer optional interviews. Interviews can provide greater »»Find out what admission option your insight for the student about the college student is going to take. Their choices and whether it’s a fit for them while also are EA-Early Action, ED-Early Decision, allowing the college to learn more about Regular or Deferral. the student. »»Know what application form your student is using (the Common Application, the Universal Application or the Institutional Application). »»Let your student know you are available as a sounding board or coach to offer your feedback on their application essay, review their application before its submission to the school and any other part of the process where they might need review.

»»Create a Common Application or Universal Application account on their respective websites. Many public colleges also have their own institutional application and require an account as well. »»Know your audience (the admissions counselor). »»Choose teacher recommendations carefully and ask early in the school year because, if your student is asking, chances are other kids are too.

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College »»Make sure the college application essay answers the prompt and is 100 percent grammatically correct. Have someone look it over. »»Make copies of everything that is submitted. »»Understand the high school’s part in the application process; connect with the guidance counselor who will also be writing a letter of recommendation. »»Follow-up with colleges after you submit your application. Call or e-mail schools to be sure all information has been received. Colleges will not process applications until they are complete. »»Create and submit a student resume or profile – this is an extra effort that sends a positive initiative message to schools. »»Develop a checklist of this process so tasks can be checked off as completed. There’s a lot to remember, and breaking all this down into doable parts can help. Visit www.familypathways.com to find and print out a helpful checklist. Be willing to let go and allow your student to navigate this application process. You may want to help, and you can by providing information and listening well, but this is really their responsibility and allowing them to succeed or fall short is OK. Weekly “check-ins” can help you to feel like a part of the process without being a helicopter parent. Colleges are looking for student applications to be an authentic reflection of your child, not what you think or provide for them. It’s a time for your student to fully share their uniqueness, their voice and their ownership of the process. mp

Steve Michaud, owner of Family Pathways College Counseling, is a practicing independent college counselor in Bozeman. Steve has extensive experience with families from coast to coast helping them to navigate post secondary options. Contact Steve: [email protected] or call 406-570-1178 or visit www. familypathways.com for further information on his services for families.

September 2014 | mtparent.com

15

Think

College Getting into a

Top 25 College…

new l After Schuonodup

o activities r

Yes You Can

WRITTEN BY PAULA BESWICK

A Top 25 school, as defined by magazine rankings like the ones in U.S. World News & World Report, is both the pinnacle achievement for some high school students and an elusive goal for others. Sometimes it’s just the thought of getting there, of being worthy that is the most daunting.

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montana parent growing up under the big sky

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from birth to college

September 2014 | mtparent.com

With rare exception these schools remain the same year after year, with some jockeying for position within the top 10. But the constant is the high-quality education that each institution offers, along with the high price tag. Cost aside for the moment, Montana students can greatly benefit from the campus experience of a top school where they will encounter diversity in socioeconomics, ethnicity, as well as a different region and character of the country. So how does a Bozeman or Helena kid get into a Top 25 school? Here’s a quick primer. 1. Believe that it is possible. Top schools love geographic diversity, and usually Montana, Wyoming, Idaho and Alaska are underrepresented. So if you have the qualifications, location helps. But you need the qualifications first. 2. If you believe it’s possible, make the choices to get you there. Take as many AP classes as you can – admissions offices check high school curriculums. Be active in clubs, sports or music, but don’t spread yourself thin thinking the more, the better just for your application. Be dedicated and take a leadership role in the endeavors that are meaningful for you.

3. Study for the standardized tests. ACT and SAT scores are important. A high score won’t get you in, but a low score can surely keep you out. Check out books from the public library and take the practice tests. Visit www. collegeboard.com and sign up for the question of the day, as well as soaking up all the good info provided. Juniors, study for the PSAT – it’s important for National Merit standing and potential scholarships. 4. Keep your grades up. You don’t have to have a 4.0, but the number should at least be within sight. 5. Get to know a couple of high school teachers well and ask them for recommendation letters early. Admissions officers take these letters very seriously, especially if it’s a particularly tough year. 6. It should go without saying, but stay out of trouble. Enough said. 7. Finally, look at the cost, but don’t overly worry about it if you have a dream school. Make sure you apply to a good variety of schools that you’ve talked about as a family. A bonus with many of the top schools is “blind admission,” which means that if you can get in, they make it financially possible to attend. So truly, dream big. It worked for my family. Both of my Bozeman High School kids are in top schools in the Boston area. It was a family process, but they did all the hard work to make it happen. The opportunities they have had are unbelievable and simply not possible everywhere. Plus, the scholarships and financial aid made the cost doable, and both kids will come out debt-free from undergrad. We always believed it was possible, and sometimes that’s all you need to start.

mp

Paula K. Beswick is the foundation director for the Bozeman Public Library Foundation.

Year 13 In The

Yellowstone

A Career Education Program for Montana’s Youth WRITTEN BY SAM KORSMOE

America’s student debt load is at national crisis proportions. University graduates from the Class of 2014 will have an average of $33,000 in student debt according to the Wall Street Journal. Can you think of a worse way to begin a professional career and life? Academics, university administrators and politicians have lots of ideas to address this issue such as tuition freezes, more state support, more philanthropy for scholarships and so on. At this stage of the crisis, no idea is a dumb idea even if some ideas never seem to pan out or have enormous political hurdles to clear. I would like to introduce a new, Montana-based idea for the readers of Montana Parent. The Yellowstone English/Environmental Studies Program International (YESPI for short) is a private education company based in the Yellowstone. YESPI considers the Greater Yellowstone Ecosystem the world’s greatest outdoor classroom and laboratory and uses the ecosystem as much as possible for all education programs. YESPI’s proposal is called “Year 13 In The Yellowstone” and it’s geared toward helping high school juniors and seniors and first and second year college students decide, as soon as humanly possible, what they want to do for a career. Today, one-third of college students drop out between their freshman and sophomore years and only 36 percent of those who do remain in school manage to graduate in five years or less. The others take six, seven or more years because they change majors, transfer schools, aren’t ready for college or otherwise have no clue what they want to do in life. Who can blame them? They are only teenagers. It’s no wonder so many have such high debt loads when they finally do graduate.

Think

College Year 13 addresses this lack of clarity and/ or career confusion head on with Meet the Experts workshops held over weekends in the fall and spring. YESPI brings in career professionals in the STEAM subjects of Science, Technology, Engineering, Arts and Math to talk and share with students in a workshop setting. These experts will share their academic experiences, career highs and lows and otherwise describe what it’s like to be an engineer, lawyer, scientist, computer programmer, business owner, etc… YESPI believes that the students who enroll in Year 13 workshops will be able to scratch a few potential careers off the list, narrow the list down to one or two and then have a more productive final year of high school or first/ second year of college. High school students may decide to take A.P. classes that better fit their future. College students may choose a major, or at least a career field, that they know will work for them and avoid changing majors midstream. YESPI wants the Year 13 workshops to help Montana youth find their passion for a career and life and, most importantly, figure out how to graduate in four years. And Year 13 is not just about meeting the experts, there is also an entire Life Coach session that will give participants the tools to get clarity and ideally identify a career path. YESPI will also bring in a financial expert who will explain the real total cost of education, the price of missed opportunities, the cost of changing majors, the value of savings and exponential growth and other concepts that some readers of Montana Parent have probably tried to explain to their children.

B ozemanChildblo om.com

406.551.3496 Craig@B ozemanChildbloom.com

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This is a serious issue. Taking six years to graduate from college and leaving with a debt of $33,000 for a degree in “whatever” is no laughing matter. The rubber of life hits the road a lot quicker than in past years. YESPI is addressing this issue. Please go to www.yespi. net for more information or call Sam Korsmoe at 406-570-4531.

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mp

Sam Korsmoe is the President of the Yellowstone English/ Environmental Studies Program International.

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Name:

Bozeman - Parent Magazine 17 Color

September | mtparent.com Size: 2014 2.35” x 4.6”

Ink:

Think

College

Is Through WRITTEN BY STACEY TOMPKINS, MA, CIC

I can finally talk about it without weeping. Here’s what happened: Both my daughters petitioned to go to boarding school. One was 17 and going to be a senior and the other was 15 and a sophomore. I was adamantly opposed to this plan, but it was three against one – my husband spent a postgraduate year in boarding school and is a fan. This time I didn’t get my way. And in an ironic twist of fate, I was the parent who escorted our daughters from Montana to Massachusetts and settled them into their dorm. Life had underprepared me for the humidity, the formal etiquette and the final goodbyes. Being identified with motherhood is an occupational hazard, and it’s impossible to avoid if one is at all passionate about the position. So when the kids fly the coop, what then? Who am I when I have no lunches to make, no soccer tournaments to attend, and movie night now consists of all the popcorn I can eat while my husband – barely – tolerates my love of dramatic comedies? Who am I when I don’t have to keep track of schedules, curfews, hockey gear and orthodontic appointments? How do I find meaningful work that can come close to matching that of motherhood? The “Empty Nest Syndrome” accurately describes having lovingly created a homey, welcoming space that has now been abandoned by its primary occupants. All that work, all that nurturing, and now? Echoing emptiness. Like a pit in the stomach. I understand why it’s called a syndrome.

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HOW TO PERSEVERE: 1. Go ahead and cry. Stifling emotion only creates headaches and ulcers. Tears transform your body chemistry and are necessary for expressing what’s happening. Don’t waste your life feeling embarrassed about crying. Everyone cries, and welcoming it invites others to sob along with you. Good bawling sessions often lead to awesome laughing fits. 2. Create ritual. I’m not necessarily talking about elaborate or mystical ritual, but an honoring of the rite of passage that’s taking place. Focusing on an event allows meaning to be welcomed. Ideas for ritual are: a special breakfast, a walk in the woods, a collection of writings or music. Be intentional about the ritual, so you create a collective time marker that officially begins the transition. I’m a fan of the bon voyage party, including cards and gifts and an abundance of tears. For me, it takes a village to experience a proper goodbye. 3. Tune into yourself. There is opportunity here. You don’t have to know what it is yet (a calling, a niche, a project, a job, an opening, a stillness) but just attune yourself to your surroundings and trust that a worthy path will present itself. Is it possible that this meaningful goodbye could also heal and encompass other goodbyes that were unsatisfying, incomplete or unsaid? 4. Become your own generous ally. Reach out to others who are experiencing a similar life transition. When I think of all the people suffering a similar sadness all alone in their homes, it makes me crazy. Surviving a challenging transition requires a community of friends, neighbors and colleagues. Allow support to come from anywhere it’s offered. People want to help, so don’t rob them of the chance to be kind to you. And when they’re generous and loving, remember to feel it. Soften. Be vulnerable. Fall apart for a while. 5. Feel the goodbye. Goodbyes are unavoidable in this life. Suppressing the feelings that come with separation creates unnecessary suffering. Goodbyes are tough enough; don’t make them harder by avoiding what’s happening. It’s said

September 2014 | mtparent.com

TOGRAPHY PHOTO E. KELLEY PHO

The Only Way Out

to take a year to eighteen months for such transitions to be fully integrated. Settle in and welcome the change. Don’t rush it or belabor it. Just be with it. Libby Michaud, mother of five, offers this about the empty nest experience, “You can miss your kids and still be OK. Remember, successfully launching your children is the ultimate goal. Celebrate the moment and know that having these intense feelings is a gift. Know that something transformative will come of it, for them but also for you.” It’s been two years since my kids took off. I always miss them, but the acute ache has subsided and my attention has drifted toward expressing myself and building a meaningful business that keeps me fully engaged. Unexpected moments of connection and insight have come from this quieter, less rushed time. It’s been wildly liberating, discovering who I am without the constant demand of parenting and caring for my two daughters. It feels weird to say it, but now I’m grateful they went to boarding school. I could not have imagined saying that two years ago. Remain open to possibility, because you just never know what will show up. mp

Stacey Tompkins lives and works in downtown Bozeman with her elderly mutt, her angler husband and the random delightful Airbnb guest. She has a private practice working with individuals, couples and groups as an integral coach through Sungate Integral Coaching, LLC. She also works with local businesses as a trainer, coach and consultant through her business, Mindful Momentum, LLC. (406-470-1304 or tompkins.stacey@ gmail.com) 

Paying for college and figuring out financial aid isn’t easy. But the truth is, we get it! It’s our job. We can help! Student Assistance Foundation offers staff at outreach offices around the state to help students and families realize their dreams of higher education. Visit SmartAboutCollege.org to learn more. - College planning and college success strategies

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19

Think

College

The view from the room formerly known as mine.

The Soon-To-Be-Empty Nest

Converting empty bedrooms into

useful empty-nest rooms ARTICLE & PHOTO ELEANOR BARKER

Shortly after I left for college, my parents demolished my bedroom and made it part of their beautiful, new eat-in kitchen. I can’t remember exactly when they erased all traces of my ever having lived with them, but it was probably just before they knocked down that wall to convert my older sister’s bedroom into a gracious dining room, and not long after they got rid of the tournament-grade Ping Pong table in the living room and had all the floors refinished. (In case you’re wondering, my younger sister’s bedroom remains a shrine to this day, but let’s not go there.) In my teenage egotism, I had assumed that the absence of their children would cause my parents to suffer immensely. I pictured them desperately clinging to one another in their empty nest, waiting by the phone for our calls and wondering how to fill their formless days. As it turned out, they made the adjustment with astonishing speed.

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

In just a few, short years, my husband and I will be ushering our kids into young adulthood, and though the Mayo Clinic tells us that we may find ourselves “coping with the feelings of sadness and loss,” I expect we’ll rely on our friendly neighborhood handyman to help us ease the transition, just as my parents did. Here’s what we’ve got planned:

The Music Room. Today we refer to it as our son’s bedroom, but in the nottoo-distant future it will be where the folk band gets together and will house a dozen instruments, a CD library and 10,000 pages of sheet music. The Project Room. Our other son

sleeps here when he’s not wherever it is that teenagers spend their time, but I’ve already planned exactly where my oil paints, photography books and sewing supplies will go.

The Library. Right now, this room is filled to the brim with Legos, model cars, and – wait for it – a Ping Pong table. But I think built-in bookshelves, two comfy leather armchairs and one of those nifty electric fireplaces would make it just perfect. Yes, my husband and I are looking forward to reimagining the spaces our kids eventually vacate, but we’ll make sure that the walls to their rooms remain standing. Why? According to the Pew Research Center, it seems that 36 percent of young adults ages 18-31 are currently living with their parents. So we’ll enjoy our empty nest while it lasts. It may turn out to be a passing fad. mp

Eleanor Barker is Executive Director of the Children’s Museum of Bozeman. She and her husband enjoy skiing, CrossFit and quality time with two teenage boys.

Think

College Your vibrant family: Healthy, well, and wise!™

THE [College] TALK

Your resource for prenatal and pediatric care!

WRITTEN BY STEPHANIE MCDOWELL

The majority of young people (75 percent of boys and 60 percent of girls) have had sex by the time they finish high school. Most of those who have not will have their first sexual experience while in college. College life offers greatly expanded opportunities for self-governance and independence during which young people learn to manage their sexual relationships and their sexuality. Learning to manage one’s sexuality provides opportunities for mastery and growth, but also poses risk of unplanned pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. We all want our children to be successful, especially when they start college. Helping them make healthy decisions about their sexuality and reproductive health is pivotal to success at college. Before you send your teen to college, consider discussing: »»The risks of Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs) and how to protect yourself »»The basics of birth control for men and women »»How to use a condom correctly »»How to avoid unintended pregnancy »»Signs of unhealthy relationships Studies have shown that young adults are at increased risk during their college-aged years.

Dr. Kimberly Maxwell offers:

»»1 in 4 college students will contract an STI by the time they graduate. »»61 percent of college students who have children and 48 percent of college students who have been pregnant or gotten someone pregnant after enrolling, don’t finish their education. Statistics can’t tell the whole story about something as personal as sex. People ultimately make their own choices based on many factors, including privacy, opportunity, finding a caring partner, cultural and/or religious beliefs and trust levels. Talking with your teen about sex can help them make choices based on their own values rather than peer pressure or what they believe other people are doing. Remind your teen that it’s important to be true to yourself — to have sex, the kind that you want, by yourself or with a consenting partner, when/because you want to and not because of anybody else’s behavior.  For a list of helpful resources, visit www. bridgercare.org/resources/ or contact Bridgercare’s Community Outreach Specialist, Hannah Wilson, at hwilson@ bridgercare.org or 406-587-0681.

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College Montana Money Magic: Helping Montana Students Save for the Future WRITTEN BY CAROLYNN BRIGHT

Student Assistance Foundation (SAF) is looking for student candidates to participate in its Montana Money Magic program in six regions across the state.

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Montana Money Magic is geared toward helping qualifying low-income students save for college and learn how to manage their money. To qualify, students must be between the ages of 16 and 19, in high school and from a family with an income of less than 185 percent of the federal poverty level.

In addition to receiving important instruction on financial literacy, participating students will have the opportunity to earn a 3-to-1 match on their personal savings. Those who save $450 through the program can earn the maximum match of $1,350. Matched funds can be used to pay for a variety of items to help students gain access to higher education including dual enrollment, tuition and fees, tutoring, test fees, computers and more. The counties that are included in this project include: Gallatin, Park, Meagher, Glacier, Toole, Pondera, Cascade, Choteau, Teton, Big Horn, Carbon, Stillwater, Sweet Grass, Yellowstone, Broadwater, Jefferson, Lewis and Clark, Missoula, Ravalli, Mineral, Silver Bow, Deer Lodge, Beaverhead, Madison, Powell and Granite. Following the initial 18-month term, the grant can be renewed for three additional, 12-month terms.

“Thanks to a $1.68 million grant from the Family Economic Security program at the Montana Department of Public Health and Human Services (DPHHS), SAF will be able to reach out to this extremely important segment of our student population,” said Kelly Cresswell, SAF’s vice president of foundation activities. “These are students and families who may not otherwise have the opportunity to save for college, or even necessarily consider postsecondary education an option.”

If you know a student who would qualify and benefit from this program, contact the SAF outreach manager in your area by dialing (877) COLG4ME (265-4463):

According to information provided at the Montana College Affordability Summit in Helena last year, Montana ranked 24th in the country in 2010 for its rate of low-income students who go on to attend college — a rate that Cresswell believes can be improved through programs like Montana Money Magic.

»»Broadwater, Jefferson, Lewis and Clark | Marti Johnson

»»Gallatin, Park, Meagher | Nolan Glueckert »»Glacier, Toole, Pondera, Cascade, Choteau, Teton | Allen Heisler »»Sweet Grass, Yellowstone | Kalie Porter »»Big Horn, Carbon, Stillwater | Jennifer Almli

»»Silver Bow, Deer Lodge, Beaverhead, Madison, Powell, Granite | Schylar Canfield-Baber »»Missoula, Mineral, Ravalli | Greg Kolwicz

mp

Carolynn Bright is the Communications Officer for the Student Assistance Foundation.

Scoping for Scholarships: They’re Out There; Start Looking

Think

College

WRITTEN BY CAROLYNN BRIGHT

Scholarship deadlines arrive quicker than you think, so if you anticipate needing financial help for school, then you should start the process as soon as possible. Take some time this fall to visit with your guidance counselor and contact the financial aid office at the postsecondary schools you want to attend. (About 90 percent of scholarships are awarded locally and by the school that a student is hoping to attend.) Search websites including your college financial aid office website or office, the Montana Career Information System (mtcis. intocareers.org/), FastWeb.com, scholarships.com or Collegeboard. com to find scholarships for which you might qualify. “Remember scholarships aren’t just available to students with the greatest financial need, although that is a consideration for some awards,” said Allen Heisler, Student Assistance Foundation’s outreach manager in Great Falls. “Scholarships are available to students for reasons ranging from academic success to athletic prowess and volunteer efforts — in truth, there’s something for everyone.” Identifying some scholarships for which you would like to apply now will allow you time to ask coaches, teachers and others for letters of recommendation. Plus, you won’t be rushed to complete application forms, write essays (if required) and put your best effort into attaining some money to help pay for school. Pay close attention to deadlines — don’t waste your time preparing applications for scholarships with deadlines that have already passed, and make sure you don’t miss out on scholarships with deadlines that are looming.

NOW ENrOLLiNg! SChOOL yEar SESSiONS bEgiN ON SEptEmbEr 2.

Many scholarship committees place a great deal of emphasis on the essays that accompany scholarship applications. Keep the following in mind: »»Grammar and spelling count (you aren’t texting a friend). »»Promote yourself by talking about extracurricular activities, paid and volunteer jobs and more. »»Share your personality and creativity through your essay in order to set your application apart from others.

ONE-tO-ONE iNdividuaLizEd iNStruCtiON fOr ChiLdrEN agES 4-18.

»»Be enthusiastic about the scholarship for which you are applying and explain how receiving it will help you achieve your goals.

at SagE LEarNiNg CENtEr, Our miSSiON iS tO idENtify & dECrEaSE thE gap bEtWEEN a pErSON’S pOtENtiaL aNd thEir pErfOrmaNCE.

»»Ask for help. Have a teacher, parent or friend edit and critique your application. »»Follow up. Make sure your application was received and ask if additional information is required.

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406-582-9570

When applying for scholarships, it’s important to remember that there are no “guaranteed” scholarships and that legitimate organizations don’t charge a fee to apply. Be cautious. Once you are notified that you have received a scholarship, accept it in order to assure that funds are reserved for you. Should you decide to attend a different school at which certain scholarships don’t apply, notify the other schools promptly so that they can free up that financial aid for other students in need. Finally, remember to extend your gratitude for the investment in your academic future by sending a thank-you note. Donors enjoy hearing from students and learning how their scholarship funds are making a difference. The nonprofit Student Assistance Foundation is available to provide free assistance with scholarship searches and preparation, in addition to FAFSA (Free Application for Federal Student Aid) completion. To find an outreach office in your area, visit smartaboutcollege.org/outreach.jsp, or call 877-COLG4ME (265-4463). mp

Carolynn Bright is the Communications Officer for the Student Assistance Foundation.

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

23

Think

College On the couch with Dr. Kelsch: Session 13

Tips to Ensure a

Successful College

Freshman Year

PHOTO E. KELLE

PH Y PHOTOGRA

Y

WRITTEN BY DR. DONNA KELSCH

I heard a saying the other day: “The days move slowly but the years move quickly.” I am very aware of this as I prepare my eldest for high school knowing that in four years it will be college. Here are some tips for your college freshman. Social Life: If you ask any honest adult how they felt the first week of college, they will admit they were nervous. After all, you’re away from home – and not for a sleepover, but to create a life of your own. Whether in a dorm or an apartment, you are on your own. A client of mine who recently went to college orientation returned anxious and worried and began to doubt her decision to go to college. My advice: relax. The first week is intimidating, but once you begin the life you want in college, it becomes awesome. Partying: Let’s face it – college kids have parties. But partying doesn’t mean drinking and doing drugs until you pass out. Be smart; one night of poor judgment can affect you forever. There will be thousands of people you do not know at college and not all of them are partiers. Go to the gym, it’s a social hub for healthy partying. Check out other clubs and activities where you may have an interest. Join a fraternity or sorority for friendship and leadership opportunities. If you do choose to go

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

Greek, do your research and talk to people. Hazing and pledging rites can be over the top sometimes. Most students on campus will know the houses with bad reputations. Sleeping: It is essential that you get a good night’s sleep. Red Bull-cramming for tests will not allow you to make it to sophomore year. According to statistics, one-third of college freshmen do not become college sophomores. Academic Life: Most of my MSU clients land in my office due to situational depression and anxiety. They are taking classes they hate and are failing. Why? “My mom and dad said I would be a good electrical engineer since math comes naturally to me.” College academic life involves exploring who you want to be, connecting with people from diverse backgrounds and ideas and, of course, studying. Exploring: Don’t take classes for easy A’s. Take classes to enrich your soul and help you become the adult you want to be. College courses should enlighten you to careers and jobs that you want to attain in your life. You should enjoy most of your college courses; if you’re not, then rethink your choices. And if you don’t choose a major freshman year, don’t worry. Explore your interests and, from there, find your passion. According to the Wall Street Journal, individuals may have up to seven careers in their lifetime and generally do not stay with the same company their entire career. This is your life and your opportunity to explore future career paths.

Connecting; Meet people who are different from you. This will allow you to define the person you want to become. Accept guidance from others and always stay connected with mom and dad; they are missing you and, if you are honest, you are missing them. Studying: You do have to study in college. The rule of thumb is two-to-three hours for every credit hour. This means that a full-time student will devote 4045 hours a week to school. Go to class and review your notes after class. Look at the syllabus and figure out when and how you will get papers and projects completed. Use the library or another quiet place to study. Finally, employ the psychological principal of primacy and recency. This involves taking breaks in your studying, since the first and last things you study are easier to retain. mp

Dr. Donna Kelsch is a licensed professional counselor with Tri Therapy. Tri Therapy provides counseling and assessments for teens, couples and families. Call 406-404-1009 for an appointment or contact her via web at tritherapymt.com or email dkelsch@tritherapymt. com. Dr. Donna lives in Bozeman with her husband and three children.

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Keep Calm ~ Dine On

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College Staying Physical

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

While college can be a truly magical time, it is not without its pitfalls. Stress can be overwhelming for some and the sedentary scholarly lifestyle can wreak havoc on your previously youthful and energetic body. The verdict is still out on the “freshman 15,” but most studies suggest that 70 percent of freshmen gain between 10 and 30 pounds. Weight gain and immobility can lead to depression, increased alcohol consumption and poor sexual choices. A huge key to success in college is physical activity. According to a multiyear study at Tufts University, college students who engaged in physical activity a minimum of three times a week were more likely to experience greater happiness and overall health. Here are a couple of simple ways to keep your body strong and healthy. For, as Thomas Jefferson stated: “A strong body makes the mind strong.” Diet: The college dining hall offers a bottomless array of foods, some containing healthy ingredients, but many not. I must confess that I lived on a steady diet of Fruit Loops cereal during the first term of my freshman year. Such high caloric foods will undoubtedly lead to weight gain without a balanced diet and exercise. Freshmen already feel self conscious about their clothes, academic achievement and ability to make friends, so why add decreased body image to that equation? When facing the all-you-caneat style college buffets try to find fresh fruits and veggies and avoid processed foods that are sugar laden and high in calories. Remember that your stomach

is approximately the size of your fist and your portion sizes should reflect that amount and not exceed it, unless you have performed your daily exercise. Exercise: Change, increased workload or struggle can bring about stress, which can make you doubt your abilities and keep you up at night, leaving you exhausted and vulnerable to more stress. It’s a vicious cycle that can be difficult to break. Exercise is a key component to achieving positivity and peace of mind as it releases endorphins that help to elevate mood. Exercise also enables you to sleep more deeply and with less interruption. Everything seems a bit more manageable in the morning after a good night’s sleep. In addition to keeping you positive and well rested, physical activity is crucial to offsetting the sedentary nature of college classes, studying and library time. Join the campus gym, sign up for a group fitness class or join an intramural team. Being part of a sports team at any level helps you feel like you belong to a community of like-minded people and makes college seem a bit smaller. These options are often included in your tuition and fees and are a great place to meet new friends. Although it can be challenging to make it to the gym or fitness classes with your academic course load, college campuses are some of the most friendly biking and walking neighborhoods available. With campus roads typically closed to thru traffic and offering multiple paved pathways, it’s no sweat to bike or walk to classes. Finally, wellness in college means physical safety too. There are dangers in college that leave students at risk for long term physical and mental health problems. Staying physically active and eating well is just one piece of the puzzle. Staying safe requires making wellinformed choices when it comes to alcohol, drugs and sex. Tap into the plentiful resources on your campus and get to know your professors and dorm RA on a first-name basis. They are there to help you achieve success. mp

© Amy Stoddart is owner of Bridger Pilates and Wellness in downtown Bozeman. Information on group and private instruction in Pilates can be found online at www.bridgerpilates.com. Amy is a STOTT Pilates Certified Instructor, holds an MFA in Dance, and is Resident Choreographer of the Montana Ballet Company.

PHOTO E. KELLEY PHOTOGRAPHY

Ask Annie WRITTEN BY ANNIE BEAVER

I know I need to save for my children’s college tuition, but what don’t I already know about doing that? It’s time to celebrate: September is National College Savings Month. OK, I understand this may not have you throwing confetti (although surely you’ll make time for National Apple Dumpling Day on September 17). By now we all know that college is expensive and the costs keep rising. So what don’t you already know about saving for college?

Here are a few possibilities: »»Did you know that children who know they have a college savings account in their name are 7 times more likely to attend an institution of higher learning? This is true regardless of family income, ethnicity and the educational attainment of the parents.1 »»Did you know that American families now have more college debt than credit card debt? Of the students who graduated from college in 2012, more than 70 percent had debt averaging $29,400.2

Think

College

{BUFFALO}

LEARNING

»»Did you know that by 2020, 64 percent of all jobs will require a career certificate or college degree, and by 2030 that number is projected to grow to 70 percent?3 So what does all this mean? It means that the vast majority of the jobs your children will be hunting for will require some education beyond high school. It also means that you can have an enormous impact on their decision whether or not to pursue education after high school simply by opening an education savings account for them. Furthermore, any amount you save for them now will help them exit school with a smaller debt load than they would have had without your help.

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So let’s go ahead and celebrate National College Savings Month. Here are some steps you can take now to set up your children for a lifetime of success. »»Open a 529 college savings plan in your child’s name if you haven’t already. Visit www.montanasaves.com to learn more about the tax advantages of 529s (earnings growth is tax-deferred, and qualified withdrawals are tax-free). It is easy to open an account online. »»If you’ve already opened an account, make a contribution in September. »»Redefine your goals. Rather than pegging your success on whether or not you can pay for all of your child’s education expenses, pat yourself on the back for setting the expectation that he or she will attend school after high school and that you are doing all you can to lower your child’s debt burden after graduation. mp

Annie Beaver is an Associate Financial Consultant with D.A. Davidson & Co. in Livingston, MT. Information from sources deemed reliable include 1 Center for Social Development at Washington University in St. Louis outline in, “The Role of savings and Wealth in Reducing ‘Wilt’ Between Expectations and College Attendance”; 2 The Institute for College Access and Success and 3http://blogs.wsj.com/atwork/2013/06/26/55-million-goodreasons-to-go-to-college/ as well as D. A. Davidson & Co., member SIPC.

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27

Backpacking to

Devil’s

Glen ARTICLES & PHOTOS BILL COOK

September can offer prime backpacking weather and the hike to Devil’s Glen is a great option for more adventurous Helena-area families with young children. Wild country, moderate elevation gain and established campsites make this trail perfect for families with some hiking and camping experience. Keep in mind, however, that getting to the trailhead requires a fairly long drive from Helena and that the Devil’s Glen area is prime grizzly country (before going, review the bear safety principles outlined in Montana Parent’s May 2014 issue).

To reach the trailhead, drive north

toward Augusta via I-15 and then take Highway 287 as far as Bowman’s Corner (at the intersection with Montana Highway 200). Turn left onto Highway 200 and head west until you see a sign on the right for Bean Lake (around mile marker 100). Turn right there onto an unpaved road, which you will then follow for about 12 miles to Bean Lake and the intersection with Dearborn Canyon Road. Turn left onto Dearborn Canyon Road and go about 5 miles past a few cabins and a church camp facility until you see the trailhead sign and parking lot (just past the church camp). There’s a pit

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toilet at the trailhead. Make sure you fill water bottles at home; there is no water at the trailhead, and the river isn’t easily accessible from the trail for the first 3 miles of the hike. For the first half-mile, the trail parallels an access road for cabins in the area. The road is private, and the public is not allowed on it; so be sure to stay on the trail. Pretty soon, the trail crosses the Dearborn River over a bridge; switchbacks once up a slope and then runs above the river through forested areas. The river itself is quite a bit below the trail at this point, but occasionally there are clearings where you can catch a glimpse of a narrow gorge with deep turquoise pools. The best views on this part of the trail may be up: bluffs and cliffs loom overhead, with peaks towering in the distance. The trail involves an elevation gain of about 500 feet, but none of the uphill sections is steep or long. Around the 3-mile mark, you pass through a large meadow, with a pleasant camp to the left under a big evergreen tree, not far above the river. But be aware that the river is accessible just below this camp, and is full of rapids and falls; monitor small

children carefully. Maybe a quarter-mile beyond the large meadow, the trail forks; take the fork to the left to reach a beautiful campsite above the river gorge. Just a little farther along that trail, you can walk right up to the river’s edge (where the river is much shallower and is dominated by riffles and pools). The Devil’s Glen area is just outside the Scapegoat Wilderness, and a sign says that (technically, at least) motorized vehicles such as motorcycles and ATVs can use the trail almost as far as the glen. Horses also use the trail. But on the weekday we hiked the trail in August, we didn’t see anyone at all. This is big and wild country, with plenty of elbowroom. When you’re ready to head home, just return the way you came (the return trip is nearly all downhill). The trail is within the Lewis and Clark National Forest. For more information contact the Rocky Mountain Ranger District in Choteau. mp

Bill Cook is a volunteer at the Montana WILD Education Center (2668 Broadwater Ave. in Helena), where he teaches classes on bears, mountain lions and backpacking. Montana WILD is owned by Montana Fish, Wildlife and Parks.

Snack

Time WRITTEN BY SHEL SEBREN

One of the questions most often asked at our house is, “Mom, do we have anything to eat around here?” It’s usually Graham, our sixth grader who is forever on the lookout for food, asking this. You’d think we never fed the kid, with his athletic build and perpetual need to feed. He’s just like his dad, constantly moving and burning calories faster than I can replace them. Add school days, soccer practice and play dates (oh wait, he doesn’t want me to use that phrase anymore) into the mix and the kid is constantly hunting for food. And although, yes, I work at a grocery store, going food shopping can feel like a chore after a full day on the job. So coming up with creative ideas to not only use what I already have in the cupboard but to incorporate healthy ingredients is a constant struggle. Sound familiar? Here are some kid-friendly ideas that look a little different than the classic after-school snacks but use ingredients that are likely already in your pantry.

Pinwheels

These are so easy that older kids can make them alone and adults can create one in a flash. Start with the tortilla of your choice (flavored, gluten-free and paleo wraps are available in the Chill Department of Co-op West Main) and add your ingredients. Try: »»Low-fat cream cheese (I like Organic Valley Neufchatel) and deli meat of choice (like black forest ham or roasted turkey). »»Refried beans, salsa and a sprinkle of shredded cheese (perfect use for taco leftovers); older kids and adults can brush the top lightly with oil and bake until melted. »»Nut butter of choice (Co-op West Main carries many: peanut, cashew, sunflower, hazelnut and almond, to name a few) and jelly. »»Roll up the tortilla and use a pizza cutter to slice into bite-sized pieces. Serve with sliced veggies or fruit.

Cheesy Pretzel Melt This nosh can be made ahead of time and be ready for after-school snacking. Try them with gluten-free pretzels. Place small pieces of cheddar cheese between round pretzels. Place on a piece of parchment paper and bake for about 10 minutes at about 400 degrees. Mix up the cheese for different flavors, if desired. Serve with mustard.

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Nut Butter Pretzel Sticks Who doesn’t love pretzels and peanut butter? This is a classic combo that can easily be made allergy-friendly and the presentation makes it look a little different. Dip one end of the stick pretzel in the nut butter of choice, roll into chopped nuts or dried fruit pieces. If your kiddo aced a spelling test, consider rolling it into chopped-up chocolate chips.

Pancake PB&J Sometimes we have leftover pancakes. Use them up by creating a peanut butter (or nut butter of choice) and jelly sandwich with pancakes instead of bread.

Apple Wraps

Cut apples into wedges, top with a small piece of favorite cheese and wrap with a piece of deli meat (you can buy prepackaged deli meat at Co-op West Main or purchase it by-the-pound from the deli). Secure wrap with a toothpick.

Are you hosting a playdate with a picky eater? Simplify things by using a chip and dip platter and adding a variety of cut vegetables (peppers, carrots, cucumbers and zucchini), fruit, nuts, seeds and cheese. Add hummus, salsa, yogurt dip or nut butters for dipping (and be prepared for double dipping to occur). mp

Shel Sebren works at the Community Food Co-op. She is a (mostly) reformed junk food junkie and hopes to raise kids who love whole foods more than processed foods. She’s (mostly) realistic about that.

September 2014 | mtparent.com

29

Super Natural

Skip

the Soda



WRITTEN BY CALEIGH SEARLE

Forty-one percent of children (ages 2-12) and 62 percent of adolescents (ages 12-17) drink at least one soda or sugar sweetened beverage per day. Thankfully, most parents have a grasp on the dangers of a diet high in empty calories and how terrible soda is for children’s teeth. There is also a strong link between childhood obesity and soda consumption. Soda can suppress the appetite, and phosphorous (a common ingredient in soda) can deplete calcium from the bones, a scary thing for our young athletes. The caffeine in soda can lead to hyperactivity and adrenal exhaustion and the artificial sweeteners, which are potential brain toxins, are arguably worse than the sugary sweeteners. I don’t ban all soda from my kids’ diets; an occasional treat when we go out to dinner is OK, just never diet soda. I draw the line there. There is no place in a healthy daily diet for these types of drinks when there are healthier alternatives.

Sun Tea

Sun tea is a fun and easy way to give your children something other than water to drink. I love to add handfuls of fresh mint and lemon balm to a glass jar, place it in the sun for the day, strain the herbs out and add lots of ice. If you prefer a sweeter tea, a few stevia leaves can add some natural sweetness without any of the harmful effects of sugar or artificial sweeteners. Add a few lemon slices or hibiscus flowers for a bit of tartness.

Infused Waters

These are also simple to make at home and add a subtle flavor of the fruits and herbs you infuse in the water. They are healthy too as they are full of antioxidants and vitamins.

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You will need: »»1 or 2 quart jars with a lid, depending on how much you want to make »»Fresh, clean (preferably organic or homegrown) fruit and herbs (fruits with lots of juice work best) »»Ice »»Something to muddle the fruit with (I use the big handle of a butter knife or wooden spoon handle) »»Strainer  Directions: Fill the bottom quarter of your jar with your choice of fruits and herbs, chopped or sliced, and muddle gently to release juices. Fill the rest of the jar with ice and top with water. Cover and place the jar in the fridge for a few hours or overnight, strain and drink within 24 hours or freeze cubes for later use. Fun Infused-Water Combos:

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»»A fresh lime and a few sprigs of fresh basil »»Orange and lemon »»Watermelon and lime »»Blackberry and a few lavender sprigs »»Raspberry and mint »»Strawberry and lemon »»Blueberry and lemon or lime »»Cranberries and orange »»Nectarines or peaches and blueberries »»Pineapple and orange »»Tangerine and strawberries »»Raspberries and lemon balm »»Hibiscus and peach (pretty pink color) The possibilities are endless. I never deny my boys a treat, but our daily intakes of liquids are mostly water and unsweetened drinks. mp

Caleigh Searle is a certified Clinical Herbalist with 18 years of experience and a licensed Esthetician (www.caleighsholisticskincare.com). She is a Montana native and mom of two active boys. Questions can be answered at [email protected]. 


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587-3817

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31

Fall Harvest ARTICLE & PHOTOS AMY GRISAK

The fall harvest is the big payoff for the season with the vegetables lasting weeks, if not months, when they are cured and stored properly. End-of-season harvesting is often the most fun for the family. The kids don’t have to be nearly as careful when picking vegetables at this time of the year because it really doesn’t matter if they step on plants or vines. If you’ve been fussy about how they handle things, then this is the time to loosen up and let them go. The biggest question for a lot of Montana gardeners is when to harvest. We want to give vegetables extra time in the garden as long as possible, but don’t want to be caught by a heavy freeze that ruins the crop. For tender vegetables, such as tomatoes and peppers, you have far less latitude when it comes to nighttime temperatures. You can usually protect them from a light freeze (31 to 32 degrees) for a night or two with a floating row cover, sheets or other coverings. But if the forecast calls for temperatures below 30 degrees, it’s best to harvest the entire crop. Even if the tomatoes are green (as long as they are a mature size), you can pick them and place them in a single layer in a box and keep them in the garage or shed. Check them frequently to remove any that are rotting, but they should ripen pretty well over the next several weeks. The ideal situation for winter squash is to harvest them after the vines die back, but that doesn’t often happen in Montana. Winter squash (which includes pumpkins) are ripe when you can press your fingernail into the skin without leaving a mark. Once again, you can protect them from a light frost with row coverings, but should harvest them before a freeze. If you’re going to store squash, it’s best to cut the stem instead of pulling them off the vine. With the exception of acorn squash (which is best when immediately put in a cool place), you’ll want to cure the squash for 10 to 14 days in a warm area with good air circulation. Once cured, they’ll keep for up to 8 months if stored in a location that is cool, yet doesn’t dip below 50 degrees. (An unheated room works great, such as a guest room that is closed off frequently during the winter.) Potatoes are the real treat for kids. Digging them up is like finding a buried treasure. They are ready when the plants die back. Take a shovel or a garden fork, then carefully dig and lift underneath the potato plant. Let the kids go after them, and see who can find the biggest spud. 32

September 2014 | mtparent.com

When storing potatoes you don’t want to wash off the dirt completely. Just brush off the big clumps. Use any that are cut or damaged immediately. Cure potatoes in a dark garage or shed for a week or two before moving them to cooler conditions for the rest of the winter. Optimum long-term storage for potatoes is between 35 to 40 degrees in darkness. (This might mean covered with a burlap bag.) A root cellar is every gardener’s dream, but if you don’t have one, a crawl space or cool spot in the basement works well. Be sure to snap off any sprouts that might form during the winter to keep the harvest fresh. Carrots are another fun crop for the kids. They pull easily after a rain or good soaking to the bed, but you can use a garden fork to gently lift them if the soil is a little stubborn. Allow the kids to pull until their heart’s content. Carrots will also keep throughout the winter if stored properly. Cut off the green tops and wash them well. Many people store them in buckets of sand in the basement, crawl space or root cellar so they can pull out a handful whenever they need them. Another option is to layer them like firewood in a clean 5-gallon bucket. Place a crumpled up layer of newspaper over the top 5 inches of the carrots and bury the bucket in a hole that is the entire depth of the bucket. Place a bale of straw over the top and you have an instant cold storage. For those who live in areas with heavy snow, place a tarp over the top of the straw so you can shake off the snow before accessing the bucket of carrots. They will keep until June like this. Harvesting and storing vegetables in the fall is just plain fun. Get the entire family involved so you can talk about your treasures during meals the rest of the winter. mp

Freelance writer Amy Grisak’s sons are champions at digging potatoes and hauling in the winter squash at the end of the season. You can follow their adventures at thebackyardbounty.com. 

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33

»»Celiac disease is the only disease in the world completely controlled by diet. Diagnosing Celiac Disease:

When It’s

More Than A

»»Even a few crumbs of gluten-containing food (such as one crouton) can cause a severe reaction. »»In kids, celiac disease is often called “failure to thrive” due to their little body’s inability to absorb nutrients. »»Currently the only known “cure” is a lifelong commitment to a gluten-free diet. »»Celiac is not a fad diet or a trend; it will not go out of style.

WRITTEN BY DEB WHEATON



As usual, summer has flown by and school is upon us. Seems like our feet were still wet from floating the river when I noticed the store shelves were already stocked with shiny new binders, colorful pencils and the latest, must-have gadgets. Now, as the days get shorter and the kids get back into their routines, we’re suddenly headed down the road to fall. Many of our kids are making a big school move this year. Moving up to middle school, high school . . . even headed off to college. No matter what the age, the anticipation of a new school year can also come with considerable stress and anxiety. How often have you heard: “Mommy, I have a tummy ache?” Ever notice how connected these symptoms are to your child’s stress levels? When I was a kid, the pediatrician told my mom that I had a nervous stomach. Connecting the dots backwards, I realized that from the age of 12, I often had a stomachache. That’s when the migraines started too. Everything got worse as I matured and, almost 30 years later, I was diagnosed with celiac disease. The latest research indicates that stress is one of the triggers that turn on the celiac gene. My daughter was diagnosed after she dislocated her shoulder at the same time her grandmother died. So it makes sense that symptoms might first show up during a traumatic childhood event. An accident, puberty or a move to college might provide the trigger. While it is conservatively estimated that 3 million Americans have celiac disease, research shows that 95 percent remain undiagnosed. And while celiac disease may be the most common 34

September 2014 | mtparent.com

genetic autoimmune disease on the planet, it is also one of the most underdiagnosed and misdiagnosed. The average delay in diagnosis is a whopping nine years… after onset of symptoms. If left untreated, related diseases associated with celiac include: »»Rheumatoid arthritis »»Insulin-dependent type I diabetes »»Osteoporosis »»Thyroid disease »»Lupus »»Liver diseases And that is why I have devoted the past several years of my life to raise awareness with a goal of early diagnosis along with “easy to digest solutions towards living a healthy gluten-free lifestyle” (from my “Not Even A Crumb” blog). So when should you consider that it may be “more than a tummy ache?” First, take a walk down memory lane and look at your family history. Is there a history of any autoimmune disorders? What about severe skin disorders? Dermatitis herpetiformis, the manifestation of celiac on the skin, is often misdiagnosed as psoriasis. Next, check out the celiac disease quick facts below: »»Celiac disease is the number one genetic autoimmune disease on the planet. »»Celiac disease is manifested by a complete intolerance to all foods containing gluten (wheat, rye, barley).

»»On a gluten-free diet, kids with celiac disease can thrive and lead completely normal lives. »»The blessing of diagnosis can change lives forever. The earlier the better. The pathway to a celiac disease diagnosis has dramatically improved over the past several years. First of all, we know that one of two genes must be present to have celiac disease, and a simple blood test is now available to identify those genes. Also, it’s important to note that while one is born with the genetic propensity for celiac, it may never develop. Research continues to determine what “turns on” the genes for celiac disease to manifest. So, why the delay in diagnosis? Well, belly aches, headaches and other aches and pains are normal childhood maladies. And every kid has bouts of nausea, diarrhea and constipation. With no fevers or blood to deal with, many doctors just pass it off as normal. Thus, many of our kids suffer for years before being diagnosed. Then, after everything else has been ruled out, celiac disease ends up being a diagnosis of elimination. If this article resonates with you, talk to your doctor and ask for testing. The ad on page 35 is part of Celiac Disease Foundation’s campaign to raise awareness. More information is available at www.celiac.org. mp

Deb Wheaton is co/founder of Montana-based Gluten-Free Prairie, LLC (www.glutenfreeprairie. com), offering certified gluten-free, grown-inMontana grain-based products. She is also a writer/ blogger “Offering Easy to Digest Solutions for Living a Gluten-Free Lifestyle” at www.notevenacrumb. com. She is credited as co-author of “500 Gluten-Free Dishes”. Deb is not a doctor, lawyer, rocket scientist or astronaut. But she IS a passionate advocate on a mission to raise awareness about Celiac Disease.

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35

Locked and

Dimly Lit WRITTEN BY RENÉE DEGROOT

Burdened with a jaw that locked uncomfortably every time I ate or slept, I figured that I should get some professional care. I had somehow gotten the impression that chiropractors deal with the body’s structure, so in that direction I headed. Thankfully, Dr. Anderson of Wellness Montana, was able to alleviate the symptoms within two or three adjustments.

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Little did I know that this was just the beginning of a journey of discovery about what was going on in my body—and of understanding the true nature of health. X-ray films taken by Dr. Anderson revealed a huge amount of unevenness starting from my hips, moving through scoliosis in my spine, to unequal shoulders and then culminating in a locking jaw. Thus began my lesson that symptoms don’t come from out of the blue, but come directly from the condition of the body. My second lesson was that an improper structure can cause incomplete nerve flow to vital organs. My treatment alleviated symptoms I hadn’t even considered, much less connected to issues underlying my troublesome jaw: blood sugar imbalance, hormonal imbalance, carpal tunnel syndrome and more. Symptoms are the body’s way of coping; to alert the presence of dysfunction and protect what’s most vital. Symptoms are teachers, just like good doctors. Both help you learn about your body and assist you in responsibly caring for it. Attend to your symptoms and seek treatment from a holistic doctor who will work with what your body is telling you. Doctors of Chiropractic, specifically, help restore the body’s power to heal itself by optimizing structure and nerve function.

My own specific area of interest— traditional, real food—follows the same process. Inadequate nutrition leads to deficient function. Many of the food products out there today have little nutrient-density, unlike the real foods traditionally eaten by our ancestors. Symptoms of disease alert you that your body is reacting to, and trying to cope with, poor input. They point to the root cause. The body reacts very precisely and almost predictably to the nutrition, the information and all the input that it is given. There are two body systems that are especially vital to transmitting information and nourishment to the body. Think of your nervous system and digestive system, at their most basic, as the tandem of electrical and plumbing in a home. Giving your body the fullest quality of input via its complementary “wiring” and “plumbing” channels is vital to the absence of symptoms and the presence of enduring health. Indeed, the very etymology of our word for nerve interference—subluxation— is “less light.” A person can live for up to an hour without a beating heart; a person can live for ten minutes without breath in their lungs, a person can survive for days without food; but without an electrical signal, a person will die instantly. Though all are vital, the nervous system is in this way supreme. Today I have a whole new appreciation for the nature of health and the reason for symptoms. Now I work for the doctors at Wellness Montana, and we see symptoms alleviated and healthy function restored every day. Get sunshine and exercise, eat real food and give us a call to see how Dr. Anderson can help you take a close look at your health. At our office, we love to help entire families—parents and their children— live fully and functionally. mp

Renée DeGroot, a Montana native, is a chiropractic assistant at Wellness Montana (www.wellnessmontana.com) and a Certified Natural Food Chef. Her website is www.MountainCulinaire.com.

+

Butte

corner on health

Planning for the

Unexpected WRITTEN BY MARIE MITCHELL

Going out of town without your children? What if your return is unexpectedly delayed? Or you have car trouble, cancelled flights, severe weather, a 9/11 event or a major electrical blackout? These are real and increasingly frequent events. Do you have a plan to care for your children? Take some time now to prepare for the unexpected. 1. Who would you want to care for your children? Make sure a family member or friend is willing to take on your role, even if temporarily. You might want to consider emergency guardianship documents. 2. Write a will. Even if you have limited assets, this is an essential document, stating your wishes for your children. 3. Have financial information readily available. Others may need to access your accounts to care for your children. Appoint a trusted executor for your estate who will look out for your children’s best interests. Make a list of all savings and checking accounts, investments and retirement plans. Include contacts and account numbers. Provide a notarized letter for permission to access your accounts and any safes or safety deposit boxes.

4. Keep a health care folder for each child. Include a list of health care providers, histories of surgeries/ hospitalizations and immunization records. (See Montana Parent September, 2011 issue “Organizing Health Information.” This can be accessed on the Montana Parent website, www.mtparent.com, in the archives or through the Four Corners Health Care website at www.4chealthcare.com under the articles tab). 5. Write an advance medical directive. This states your wishes for health care if you should become seriously ill or injured. Make sure your family, a trusted friend or attorney and your health care provider know where this document is stored.

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6. Don’t wait for a big trip to make these plans. Include a backup plan for child care for possible daily emergencies, such as missing your child’s school bus pickup or a work shift that runs overtime. Your children should know where to go or who to call if you are unexpectedly unavailable. All day care providers and babysitters should have a backup contact list too. Life is full of surprises and the unexpected happens, well, when we aren’t expecting it. Prepare for these situations in advance so you can rest easy knowing your children will be safe. mp

Marie Mitchell is nationally certified and licensed in Montana as both a Pediatric Nurse Practitioner and Family Nurse Practitioner. She is the owner of Four Corners Health Care and is accepting new patients. Call 556-8300 or visit: www.4chealthcare.com.

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37

Are We There, Yet?

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ARTICLE & PHOTOS MELYNDA HARRISON

A few weeks ago my husband and I got a babysitter. That doesn’t happen very often, so I wanted to make sure we did something fun, something active, something beyond dinner and a movie.

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g you Q

bringin

Date Night Edition

I filled my backpack with cocktail fixings and high-end chocolate, along with bear spray and water. We kissed the kids goodbye and drove to a local trailhead. It was a lovely evening—hiking along a beautiful trail, pointing out wildflowers and having uninterrupted conversation. After a couple miles we stopped, made pisco sours and toasted our perfect night out. Whether your child has left for college, aged enough to stay home alone, or you decide to splurge for a sitter, taking the time to do something a little different can bring you and your partner closer together. Mixing up the setting can lead to new conversations and new ways of seeing each other, or it might remind you of why you fell in love in the first place.

Here’s my list of date nights I’ve loved or want to try:

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

September is a great time to get out on one of the local rivers because they are less crowded and it still stays light late enough to fit in a post-work float. Pack a picnic dinner in a cooler or dry bag and hop into an inner tube, raft, canoe or drift boat. Borrow one from a friend or rent one if you aren’t a boat owner. Between casting for rainbows and navigating eddies, you and your loved one can snack on cheese and crackers and reminisce about how you used to do this all the time.

MUSEUMS AT YOUR OWN PACE

When was the last time you stopped to read the entire triceratops exhibit at the Museum of the Rockies or stared at a ceramic bowl at the Holter Museum of Art? Chances are it’s been awhile, because your kid keeps pulling you away. Hold hands with someone who won’t get bored within 10 seconds and explore one of southwest Montana’s many museums at your own pace. Then grab a decadent dessert downtown when you’re done.

SOAKING AND SUDS

There is nothing more relaxing than slipping into a hot spring with a cold beer in your hand: Unless you are slipping in with your spouse. Between Chico Hot Springs, Norris Hot Springs, Bozeman Hot Springs and Boulder Hot Springs, there is no shortage of hot water in the area. If you really want to splurge, several of these places offer couple’s massages.

HIKING WITH COCKTAILS

Our favorite date night is a hike in the woods. With chickadee songs and creek gurgles for music, pine and fir scent for atmosphere and turning aspens for decoration, the forest is an ideal spot for a romantic evening. A little exercise before and after cocktails and dessert perfectly balance this date. These are just a few ideas; I bet you can come up with others that fit your interests and activity levels. Mountain biking, climbing or walking the dog can all make an ordinary night a little extra special. mp

Melynda Harrison is the author of Ski Trails of Southwest Montana and blogs at TravelingMel.com.

Helena & Butte

Share Your Joy Back to School, Back to Homework

10 Tips

to Help Your Student

WRITTEN BY MELODY TAYLOR

Transitioning from a summer of sleeping in, playing all day and staying up late to a strict school regime and using your brain more than your body is tough for anyone. And when you factor in things like ADHD, multiple extracurricular activities or a new teacher (sometimes, a new school), you’ve got the recipe for homework struggles. So what’s a parent to do? Before you resign yourself to another year of tutoring, stimulant medications for ADHD or late-night homework marathons, consider these 10 tips to help your student succeed. 1. Have them do the hardest work first. Do the most difficult work when their brains are primed. Once it’s behind them, they’ll feel relieved to breeze through the easier homework. 2. Give them the tools to stay organized. Help your child choose a color system for binders and/or find apps that help students stay organized by sending e-mail alerts. 3. Do weekend homework on Friday. If kids do their weekend homework Friday afternoon or evening, the material is still fresh from what they learned in school. Waiting until Sunday night can cause added frustration when their memory has faded a bit. 4. Designate a regular homework time. Some kids need to come home from school and unwind. Others do best if they complete homework right after school. Either way, give them a healthy snack to keep their energy up without a crash.

5. Get them brain training. Unlike tutoring, personal brain training strengthens the cognitive skills that make up the foundation of all learning. These include brain skills like memory, auditory processing, attention, processing speed, logic and reasoning and visual processing. 6. Check their work. Go through your kids’ assignments every night and review their homework. Go through test problems that came back marked as incorrect and go over the correct answer with your child.

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7. Re-evaluate medications. Allergy medications can put your student in a fog. Stimulant medications for ADHD can have side effects and don’t do anything to help cure the attention weaknesses. Consider allergen immunotherapy and one-onone cognitive skills training, a natural alternative that addresses the root cause of learning struggles. 8. Ensure they get plenty of quality sleep. Sleep helps recharge and “reboot” your brain. Too few winks and your memory, attention and processing speed all suffer. 9. Learn to recognize signs of frustration. There are lots of reasons that kids procrastinate or take forever to do simple homework. Find out if the work is boring, too hard or too confusing and address those concerns immediately. 10. Acknowledge progress. Point out when they’re moving through multiplication problems faster or reading with fewer mistakes. mp

Melody Taylor is the director of LearningRx in Helena. For more information about LearningRx or Brain Training visit www. learningrx.com/helena or contact Melody at 406-879-3070.

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39

Seven Steps to

Improve Your Relationship WRITTEN BY KERIE HAGLER

It may seem elusive, but thanks to modern psychology and science, we can confidently say that we have cracked the code on understanding love in our significant relationships. And here it is: It’s the continual hunger for a secure connection with someone else. We have a hardwired need for emotional contact and responsiveness from our significant others to give us a deep sense of security and safety. It’s a survival mechanism. That bond of security a baby seeks with its mother to ensure it can thrive evolves into the need we have as adults to bond with a partner.  When we’re attached to someone, we depend on him or her to respond to our emotional needs. In the beginning stages of a relationship, our connection to our partner is intense and we feel safe, secure and valued. Over time, patterns of disconnection often develop. We often don’t understand or express our needs clearly. We feel a loss of connection with our loved one, we experience a primal feeling of panic and our survival instincts kick in. These little (or big) moments that come up over and over again when one or both partners feel disconnected can eat a relationship alive, or cause it to lose its potential. You can master the patterns of disconnection in your relationship, according to Lori Marchak, a local therapist and relationship expert certified in Emotional Focused Couples Therapy (EFT). She says the key is becoming aware of how those ingrained emotional fears show up and sharing them openly with your partner. 1. Identify as specifically as possible what your partner does on a regular basis that disturbs you in some way. Do you get upset when she comes home late without calling? Forgets to pick up milk on the way home? Has a particular tone in his voice? We all have different needs and preferences. If your partner never does anything that bothers you, you may be denying your own feelings, which could lead to larger problems down the road.  40

September 2014 | mtparent.com

2. Explore your own conscious and unconscious emotional response to this disturbing behavior. What is the meaning it signals? Perhaps it triggers concerns that your partner doesn’t care, won’t keep you safe, doesn’t accept you or that you’re not a priority. Sometimes we reject these responses as silly and illogical, but as humans we are wired to be exquisitely sensitive to any threats to the security of our primary relationship.  3. Tune into your body and identify where you feel a reaction to this behavior. Can you identify a feeling of fear inside your body, underneath the frustration, anger, anxiety, helplessness or other surface-level distress? 4. Identify what you do in response. Often, we either get “big” to deal with the problem or we get “small” to get away from the problem. We might get big by becoming critical of our partner’s behavior, by telling them what we want from them or by doing whatever we can to fix our partner’s problem behavior. We might get small by ignoring our partner and withdrawing inside, or by turning our attention to our kids, work or other relationships.  5. If you have a tendency to get “big” or “small” with your partner, explore with them how these reactions may have been hurtful. You partner may feel criticized or dismissed by your reactions, which may fuel their own fears. Take responsibility for how these reactions have contributed to your relationship patterns, perhaps increasing the very behaviors in your partner that bother you. Find and express genuine caring for how your reactions may have hurt your partner.  

6. Make a date with your partner to share, in an open and vulnerable way (neither too big, nor too small), what happens to you on the inside when your partner engages in behaviors that disturb you. Let your partner know you need them only to listen and understand. 7. Repeat regularly, and invite your partner to do the same.   While anyone can use this process, often it helps to have guidance and more time set aside to explore and share these powerful emotions. This is especially true if the patterns have been going on for some time. That’s why Marchak offers couples twoday weekend workshops to restore their connection and heal the underlying distress that caused them to lose the closeness they once had. This award-winning workshop is based on Dr. Sue Johnson’s best-selling book Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love, and the wisdom of EFT. It is a structured, highly effective and researchbased approach to helping marriages and committed couples. “The Hold Me Tight” workshop guides participants through EFT in a simplified, educational format that includes video examples and detailed, handson partner exercises. No matter how you choose to nurture your relationship, remember that we all need emotional connectedness and care. Make it a point to tune in and be there for each other in your everyday interactions. For more information about upcoming Hold Me Tight: Conversations for Connection® workshop in October and November in Bozeman, Billings and Missoula, visit www.closecouples.com.

mp

Kerie Hagler is a freelance writer based in Bozeman.

:: SEPTEMBER ACTIVITY & EVENT CALENDARS + BLOG + MORE @ MTPARENT.COM ::

September 2014 | mtparent.com

41

s ’ n e r d Chil

MOMoirs

O G O L TEST

WRITTEN BY SARA GROVES e

in m ag a z

“Hey nerd girl!

Can you see anything through those Coke bottles you’re wearing? If you weren’t trying so hard to be a straight-A student, you probably wouldn’t have to wear those thick, ugly glasses!”

CON

Considering that I was the nerdy straight-A student in question, I recognized that my tormentors’ taunting was certainly illogical, but it still hurt my feelings. Nerd girl? Straight-A student? Coke bottle glasses? Can it get any worse for a 13-year-old girl?

a $100 sh and cky a c 0 0 1 to Ro Win $ tificate ! gift cer Toy Company in a t Moun

That night at home, after my mom had reassured me that being smart and, curse of all terrible curses, having to wear glasses, were nothing to be embarrassed about, she repeated what she always said: “Kids can be cruel.”

Two age

s:

categorie

under • Ages 7 & ears • 8 - 12 y

Your drawing will be featured on the front of event shirts for the Huffing For Stuffing Thanksgiving Day Kids’ Run this year! Themes: Huffing For Stuffing or the Gallatin Valley Food Bank. Digital entries can be emailed to: [email protected] or printed entries can be delivered in person to Simply Office Supplies (119 North 7th Avenue in Bozeman) no later than Friday, September 19, 2014. Artists should list on a separate attachment the child’s name, phone number, email address and date of birth. Five designs for each age group will be chosen and presented on www.mtparent.com, October 1, 2014. The public will have two weeks to vote for the winning logo from each age group.

Questions?

[email protected] or 406-599-6283

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

Can they ever! Nonetheless, I made it through middle and high school intact. And as I headed off to college, where I would hang out with equally nerdy smart people while wearing contact lenses, I remember thinking that a kid would never taunt me again. But then I had my own kids. And while they’re not calling me “nerd girl” and making fun of my thick glasses (though they do like to imitate me as I try to focus on small print these days by extending their arms way out in front of them, pulling their heads in as if they were turtles and opening their eyes as wide as possible), my own kids do about as much for my self-esteem as those pesky middle-school boys did in seventh grade. I was reminded of this when I entered a department store with my 7-year-old, Peter, in tow to embark upon what is perhaps every woman’s most hated annual ritual: swimsuit shopping. To my credit, I had a very strong inkling that bringing Peter with me was a “very bad idea.”

But I had assumed it was a bad idea because Peter would get bored and would want to leave after learning what we all know – that finding the right suit can be a daylong battle. But I never imagined that bringing Peter with me was a bad idea because I would need intensive therapy to repair the damage my own child had done to my selfesteem. “What do you think about this?” Peter asked as he tugged on a string bikini. Then, without waiting for me to answer, he dismissed it completely. “Never mind. I think it’s waaaaaay too small for you.” He walked through the clothes racks examining swimsuits. “Now here’s one that looks like it would fit you!” he announced happily as he fingered a giant, flowery, onesize-fits-all beach cover-up. I refused to try on the muumuu-esque cover-up Peter suggested, but I did find several other swimsuits that looked as if they might do the job for the next few months. However, as I tried on swimsuit after swimsuit and modeled them for Peter, who stood outside waiting for me, he would sadly shake his little head as he gave me the thumbs-down. “I think that one squeezes all of your squishy parts out the bottom and I don’t like them there” was how he very aptly described one suit. I do realize that, unlike my old middleschool tormentors, Peter is not being malicious. He’s just being honest in the way that 7-year-old boys can be honest. And while I’ve been working hard to impart the value of that old adage, “Honesty is the best policy,” I recognize the fine line between honesty and brutal honesty is hard for children’s brains to differentiate. So for now, both of my boys believe in the absolute truth in all matters and situations.

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THIS IS THE LAST EXCHANGE SALE. ALL FIXTURES WILL BE FOR SALE ALSO.

The result? I’m almost afraid to go out in public these days so as not to offend the rest of the human race with my grotesqueness. For instance, when I was describing a coworker to the boys, Mike, trying to envision her, asked, “Is she old like you?” Then Peter chimed in: “Does she have yellow teeth like you? Is her hair grey and messy like yours?” Thank you, small children. Please excuse me while I go make appointments to get my teeth bleached and hair colored and apply some more of my anti-wrinkle night cream to my sagging, age-spotted skin. And their comments are not just about my physical self. Oh no. My boys are adept at making me question the entire core of who I am. “Do you know who you remind me of?” Peter asked the other day. Then, without missing a beat, he said, “Darth Vader. Except you don’t wear that funny mask. Oh — and you’re also not a guy!” It’s moments like that when I have to resist the temptation to get my Vader on and say to the boys, “You have failed me for the last time” while unleashing the mama Force on their honest little selves. But then, in the next moment, I’ll catch them looking at me – with my yellow teeth, grey hair and Vader-esque heavy-breathing, as my various squishy parts poke out everywhere – and it is just a look of pure and total love (you know the one). And with that one look, I know that for now, my boys still think I’m the most amazing person in the entire world, which is something I can see even without my thick, nerdy glasses.

Saturday, Oct. 4th 8 a.m - 3 p.m. Sunday, Oct. 5th 9 a.m. - 1 p.m. (Sunday is half price day if tag reads: DISCOUNT YES) Admission: Only $1.00 each day Bring in this ad for free admission either Saturday OR Sunday All seasons clothing for children and adults (including maternity), boots, shoes and accessories. Antiques, furniture, sporting goods, toys, books, car seats, cribs, strollers, high chairs, home décor, appliances, bedding, tools, bikes, etc.

For information: 580-9061 •www.theexchangesale.com

CMB fabulous Screen Free Week at CMB Unplug & Explore Everyday

fall programs

Learn, Play, and Grow with us! Daily Programs 11am-4pm every day m: maker monday T: Junior scientists W: Paint-a-Palooza Th: story makers F: Brain games

NEW THis Fall!

Pre-K

Explorers

Drop-off classes for kids ages 3-5. Wednesdays, from 10 to11:30 am. Sept 17- Oct 10

Children’s Museum

mp

Sara Groves lives in Helena where she is mom to Mike and Peter. She coordinates the early literacy program, Ready 2 Read, at the Montana State Library and also works as a freelance writer. 

Children’s Museum of Bozeman 202 South Willson Avenue

:: SEPTEMBER ACTIVITY & EVENT CALENDARS + BLOG + MORE @ MTPARENT.COM ::

406/522-9087

O Fwww.cmbozeman.org BOZEMAN

September 2014 | mtparent.com

43

Teach Sleep 101:

Maintaining Healthy Sleep at College www.GreaterGallatinUnitedWay.org

WRITTEN BY DIANA JULIAN

kidsLINK Afterschool Let’s face it – dorm rooms are not designed to promote healthy sleep. The noise

levels alone are a problem. (And, even if I think it’s a good idea, no college freshman is going to bring a noise machine with them.) The truth is, adolescent sleep needs should be taken just as seriously as an infant or toddler’s needs.

Help ensure all our children have a safe & nurturing place to go after school.

Sponsor a kidsLINK kid. 406.587.2194

[email protected]

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

PHOTO E. KELLEY PHOTOGRAPHY

27 School-Based Programs Across 11 Communities

Entering college brings about new opportunities, many of which consist of managing one’s own schedule. In high school, children have a set time to start and end their school day and parents set standards for when to come and go from home. The newfound freedom that comes with college should be entered into very carefully and should be considered along with proper time management. As I mentioned in a previous article, school start times in our country negatively influence healthy amounts of sleep for children and adolescents. Having the ability to pick your class schedule in college provides some flexibility in this area, so choose wisely.

Sleep maximizes our alertness during the day and also restores our memory. This is why we want to avoid “cramming” and pulling “all-nighters.” During non-REM sleep or “the deep sleep phase,” our brains are able to provide restoration: both mental and physical. This is also the specific time in which we store our memory. Therefore, staying up all night to study without a period of sleep before the test defeats the purpose. REM sleep is necessary to store the information that was studied, and a healthy duration of sleep provides the ability to relay that information when tested. Persistence and attention span are characteristics most closely related to proper amounts of sleep. The ability to concentrate is a direct result of healthy sleep. What is the point of studying for a test if you can’t concentrate while you are taking it?

Do you or your child suffer from... stuffy noses, sinus infections, difficulty breathing or persistant coughing? i f s o, w e c a n h e l p. Consistent sleep deficits will have long lasting effects on cognitive development and brain function. Although you might not think you are paying the price for lack of sleep at first, it will happen over time. The same way “junk food” affects your body; “junk sleep” will affect your mind.

Our goal is to have you lead a healthy life free of allergy or asthma symptoms.

Here are a few quick tips for college: »»If you miss a good amount of sleep the night before, try your hardest to make time for a nap that day. »»If you constantly wake up feeling groggy and disoriented after a nap, this could be a sign that you are not getting enough rest on a regular basis.

www.allergymontana.com p. (406) 582-1111

Michael C. DiCello, MD

Diplomate American Board of Allergy & Immunology

2055 North 22nd Avenue, Suite 1 Bozeman, MT 59718

Cindy K. Feddes, FNP

Certified Asthma Educator

e s ta b l i s h e d

»»Create limitations around late evening activities.

2 0 0 0

»»Don’t get in the habit of using the “snooze” button. When you hit “snooze,” your body returns to sleep and begins a new sleep cycle. In a few minutes when the alarm goes off again, it will be even harder to get out of bed than it would have been if you got up when your alarm first went off. This is because you will be in the middle of a sleep cycle that you are not able to finish. Sleep serves a restorative function for both our bodies and minds, and therefore is essential for success in college. Even if you feel you are able to function on limited amounts of sleep, you will pay the consequences in the long run, one way or another. College is hard enough, why make it harder? mp

Diana Julian is a Certified Child Sleep Consultant. For your free 15-minute consultation call 406-431-7240, email [email protected] or visit BigSkyLullaby.com.

GRIT

»»Turn off electronics at least one hour before going to bed.

Tough by Nature

Portraits of Cowgirls and Ranch Women of the American West by Lynda Lanker A new exhibit at MOR. Opening September 20th. In this inspiring exhibit, Lynda Lanker captures the strength and invincible spirit of ranch women and cowgirls in paintings, works on paper and prints. Join us at MOR for a captivating look at these iconic women of the west who gain their sustenance and livelihood from the land. Also on exhibit: America the Beautiful. The Monumental Landscapes of Clyde Butcher. Sponsored by:

Also Opening Sept. 20th America the Beautiful The Monumental Landscapes of Clyde Butcher

:: SEPTEMBER ACTIVITY & EVENT CALENDARS + BLOG + MORE @ MTPARENT.COM ::

September 2014 | mtparent.com

45

Fourth Annual Kids’

Hall oween

e m u t s o C Swap Saturday, Oct0ber 4th, 2014

at the Gallatin Valley Mall in Bozeman 10 a.m. to noon

What’s

Your Child’s Teacher’s IQ? WRITTEN BY MEGKIAN DOYLE

Bring your clean, gently used children’s Halloween costumes from years past and exchange them for others. Just imagine, your girl can be a princess for the fourth year in a row, but this year she’ll don a new gown –

for free.

For every costume you donate, you are eligible to exchange it for a new, gently used one. GA L L AT I N

46

VALL EY

MAL L

September 2014 | mtparent.com

Welcome back. In August we talked about how stress can sabotage your child’s genius. This month we’ll look at exactly how much your child’s success rests on his or her teacher’s IQ.

As a parent, if you are looking to ensure that your child will find academic success, you may want to focus on two specific categories of skills and whether or not your child’s teacher possesses them.

As parents, we generally assume that teachers in today’s classrooms have received an appropriate level of education to be proficient, but what we may not realize is that even though teachers learn methods and subject matter, they may lack skills in social intelligence.

The first set of skills is known as SOCIAL AWARENESS. (Daniel Goleman writes extensively about social and emotional intelligence. If you are interested in knowing more about the skills listed here, and their impact on success look, for his books.) Social awareness encompasses what we sense about others and consists of four main skills. The first skill is called “primal empathy.” Primal empathy is our ability to catch nonverbal cues and share in what others are feeling. For teachers, this is that sixth sense that helps them to consistently measure the climate of the classroom. Teachers who lack primal empathy often fail to improve classroom morale before it damages student learning.

When successful, college-bound students are interviewed about the teachers they say they learned from most, they rarely talk about what the teacher taught or how they taught it. What is underscored time and again looks a lot like personality traits – patience, kindness, an ability to listen. Traits like these are components of a teacher’s social intelligence, and teachers who have higher levels of social intelligence inspire students to learn more, better. The reason for this lies in the zone of cognitive efficiency we addressed last month. Teachers with better social intelligence are able to help students mediate their stress and keep them personally engaged. They are supportive, cued in to students and interested in their passions. This helps students to consistently work in the zone and stay out of the less efficient areas sabotaged by boredom and stress. Thus they are academically more successful and happier in their work.

The second awareness skill is “attunement,” which refers to the ability to listen actively without being distracted; letting others know you really hear them. Teachers who display this have students who believe their teacher is interested in them as valuable people. “Empathic accuracy” is how well you understand the thoughts, feelings and intentions of others. Teachers who lack empathic accuracy often leave students feeling misunderstood and treated unfairly.

SOCIAL AWARENESS 1. Primal Empathy 2. Attunement 3. Empathic Accuracy 4. Social Cognition

SOCIAL FACILITY

1. SYNCHRONY 2. SELF-PRESENTATION 3. INFLUENCE 4. CONCERN

SOCIAL FACILITY

1. Synchrony 2. Self-Presentation 3. Influence 4. Concern

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The fourth awareness skill is “social cognition,” which allows us to understand the social world around us and how it works. Teachers who are weak in social cognition aren’t able to connect their teaching to what students see as their immediate real life and so the work they assign feels like busy work rather than an engaging learning experience. The second category of skills is known as SOCIAL FACILITY or what we do with what we gain from our social awareness. This requires first the skill of “synchrony,” which allows us to interact effectively with other people nonverbally. Teachers who have not mastered synchrony often seem distant, hard to connect with or off in their own world, and it may seem like they are at odds with some students. The second skill of social facility is “selfpresentation” or the flexible ability to present oneself effectively in different social situations. Teachers who are weak self-presenters often seem rigid and are usually uncomfortable with challenges from students because this threatens the presentation of themselves as in charge and in-the-know. Because they lack the ability to be flexible with their teacher identity, they have trouble sharing power in the classroom or being perceived as wrong and are often defensive. Thirdly, the skill of “influence” refers to the power to shape how things happen

within social interactions. Teachers who are weak in this area struggle to help students improve their peer dynamics and are also less able to help students see the importance of their lives in the greater scope of world events. Finally, the skill of “concern” is vital to social   facility. Concern is caring about the needs of others and taking actions to meet these needs. Teachers who are weak in this area may care a great deal about their students, but their students fail to recognize this because no actions are taken to demonstrate their concern. Research has revealed that the most successful people globally are people with high social intelligence who have likely been taught by people who modeled strong examples of social awareness and social facility. If I could be on the hiring committee for each of my children’s teachers, I would look first and foremost at their social intelligence, perhaps even before looking at their teaching philosophy and resume. When kiddos have teachers with high social intelligence, they are aware that someone cares for them, enjoy learning material that is meaningful to them and understand that they occupy an important place in the world. mp

Megkian Doyle lives in Bozeman with her husband and five children. She teaches Multicultural Education at MSU and is an educational consultant for curriculum and instruction.

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*To join group classes one must take five private or semi-private sessions, or have similar pilates experience

www.reformstudiobozeman.com 3 South Black, Suite A | 406-219-3255 Bozeman, Montana Located Below Downtown Food Co-op

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

47

5  

The Family Business

WRITTEN BY ELEONORE SNOW

When asked how she achieves the work/life balance sought by so many business owners with young families, Sherri Nassar, APRN, FNP-BC cuts right to her reality: “I accept that there really is no such thing and tell myself each day ‘I’m doing the best that I can.’ That is my mantra,” she says. A mother of two and a nurse-practitioner with more than six years of medical and aesthetic dermatology experience (in addition to two years working in general internal medicine), Sherri opened Renew Skin Care in Bozeman last year. Thanks to her extensive medical background, Renew Skin Care focuses on medically derived treatments for anti-aging and skin rejuvenation, and medical grade skin care and makeup while also offering the basics of aesthetics such as customized facials, waxing, eyebrow and lash tinting. Since March of last year, Renew Skin Care has grown to include two estheticians, one of whom is also a certified reflexologist, and is currently launching new services for cellulite reduction, body contouring and skin tightening. Sherri personally researches and tries all of the services and products she offers. With a growing business and two small kiddos, Sherri’s biggest struggle is, not surprisingly, limited time. “I feel like I need about six more

butte

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

PHOTO AMELIA ANNE PHOTOGRAPHY

Sherri Nassar

hours in each day to do everything I want to do,” she says. “I deal with what I cannot change (hours in the day) by deciding what the top two or three things are that absolutely need to be done before my head hits the pillow.  Each day is a recalibration of priorities and I have had to learn to let less important things go until they either make the top three list, or I realize they weren’t important anyway.” Sherri also tries to be completely present with her family when she’s not at work, and vice versa.  “This is a work in progress,” she admits, “but I am much better at it this year than I was last year.”   Her biggest piece of advice to anyone thinking of starting their own business? “Have a solid, and preferably written (in case one spouse can’t recall what he agreed to), plan for sick child care coverage when both spouses work to alleviate stress.” Last

year was the first year that she and her husband were, as she says, “nanny-free” with her son in public school and her daughter in preschool. As irony would have it, both kiddos were sick multiple times, which made things more challenging for Sherri and her husband. “I once tried to set my daughter up in another room at my office with a movie,” she remembers. “I had my office coordinator check on her while I was with a patient, but she did come knocking on my treatment room door once. Fortunately, I’ve known many of my patients for a long time and they were very understanding of the situation. If anything, I think it makes me relatable because most of my patients have children of their own.” On October 2, Renew Skin Care will host their Second Annual Open House highlighting all of their services, launching their new body services and skin tightening and allowing attendees to cash in on special offers for the rest of 2014.  There will also be a “Dampen the Damage” event highlighting multiple ways to reverse the sun damage and pigment irregularities that many have sustained on their face, neck and chest over the summer. Renew Skin Care, 801 W. Main St., Suite 1C, Bozeman, 406-585-3770, www.renewskincaremt.com or find us on schedulicity.com mp

Like most working single moms, Eleonore Snow runs full speed at all times and sometimes goes to the store to buy milk for her kids and comes home with only wine for herself. You can judge her, it’s OK.

Parenting Single WRITTEN BY NORA DANIELS

In the last few years – ever since my husband and I split, I guess – my daughter has made it adamantly and abundantly clear that she is never going to get married. Ever. When she was little, she used to talk about maybe getting married on horseback in blue jeans, but now, she’d rather die. “Please,” she’ll say, “Name me one happily-married couple. I dare you.” My standard response to her deadeyed skepticism has been to scoff and stammer with the usual vague and benign protestations, “Now, now, dear . . . nobody knows what the future holds” or, “One never knows what goes on behind the closed doors of a marriage . . .” But, after the most recent iteration of this conversation, I decided to take my almost15-year-old realist up on her challenge and give her an example of a couple who – to the best of my knowledge – could actually be held up as a paragon of happiness. Why did I decide to devote even the tiniest amount of my very precious time and dwindling brain capacity to this question? Probably because I’ve secretly begun pondering it and may have become a bit

of a skeptic myself. I mean, when rumors of infidelity and marital discord swarm the redoubtable archetype of romance and glamour that is Beyoncé and Jay-Z, then one really does have reason to doubt, right? It’s like finding out that Santa doesn’t exist. Seriously. See, I have this weird tendency to romanticize other people’s lives. Maybe it’s a Libra thing, but I much prefer to assume that friends, acquaintances and even the beautiful strangers I see walking down the street are flawless inside and out and bound to their partners by a pure, soul-mate-kindof love. I have a friend who refuses to go see romantic movies because they strike such a painful contrast with the mundane reality of the everyday marriage. Me? I go crazy for movies like Twilight and The Vow. No matter that my own marriage fell apart and that most of my friends and family have serious issues with their own partners and sometimes doubt whether their relationships will survive, I still believe. Maybe because I need to. I need to hope that I – and everyone I love – is worthy of being unconditionally adored.

But, having said all that, I now – thanks to years of therapy and serious reading – have a much better understanding of romantic love than I did when I got married at 26. And despite my guilty pleasure passion for Twilight, I know that a happy marriage does not follow the Disney definition of spending every single second together and feeling like you could never survive without the other person. That’s actually pathological. A healthy marriage is about two independent people leading separate lives and coming together to support and love each other. Kind of like a Venn diagram, where two circles come together and intersect, overlapping slightly. Now, if I go back and apply this formula as my criteria for finding the elusive happy couple that my cynical daughter challenged me to dig up, I can actually come up with one shining example of a healthy marriage. Maybe two (although you never know what happens behind closed doors). It’s not much, but it’s something. And I choose hope. mp

Nora Daniels lives in Bozeman with her two awesome kids.

YOUR PEDIATRIC ALLERGIST in southwest Montana! Conveniently located near The Ridge Athletic Club in Bozeman. Extended hours are available on Tuesday evenings. We accept all major credit cards, and offer CareCredit service for qualified patients. We are an independent practice dedicated to high quality, individualized & affordable allergy and asthma care for patients of ALL ages. Dr. Zacharisen, board-certified pediatrician for 21 years, is especially compassionate and experienced in treating infants and children.

www.familyallergyasthmacare.com Dr. Michael Zacharisen | Board Certified Allergist/Immunologist

Voted Best Doctors in America for 13 years :: SEPTEMBER ACTIVITY & EVENT CALENDARS + BLOG + MORE @ MTPARENT.COM ::

4265 Fallon Street, Suite 3A, Bozeman

Phone: 406-451-7017|Fax: 406-451-7020

September 2014 | mtparent.com

49

Movie Lovers Tribute to

Robin Williams WRITTEN BY SIERRA FEIN

“You’re only given one little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.” ~ Robin Williams

Dead Poets Society

(1989)

Dead Poets Society features Robin Williams in a powerful role as John Keating, the out-of-the box English teacher at an all-boys prep school devoted to tradition. On the first day in his new classroom, he gives his students the famous “carpe diem” speech that invigorates a sense of urgency to make our lives extraordinary. As the boys’ mentor, Mr. Keating opens the door to the Dead Poets Society, a group that meets secretly to defy expectations and encourage each other to find their voice. Dealing with coming-of-age issues, parental disappointment and tragic situations, this film will allow your heart to grieve and find hope.

Please celebrate the life of the incredibly talented actor and comedian Robin Williams by watching these family-friendly films that honor and cherish his immortal spirit.

Title Rating Role

»»Aladdin (1992)

G

»»Fern Gully (1992)

G

»»Hook (1991)

PG

»»Dead Poets Society (1989)

PG

»»Jumanji (1995)

PG

»»Mrs. Doubtfire (1993)



PG-13

»»Patch Adams (1998)

PG-13

Genie

House of D

(2004)

In House of D, the gifted Robin Williams portrays a mentally challenged man in New York City who develops a playful and Peter Banning heartwarming friendship with a 13-year-old boy. The film is told from the flashback point of view of John Keating the grown Tom Warshaw, who’s attempting to gain insight into his current life by looking back at his childhood Alan Parrish misadventures, romance and friendship. This hidden gem Daniel Hillard/Mrs. Doubtfire of a film engages a rich cast of characters and cultivates the inner spirt. Batty

Patch Adams

»»What Dreams May Come (1998) PG-13

Chris Nielson

»»Jack (1996)

PG-13

Jack Powell

»»House of D (2004)

PG-13

Pappas

Movie Lovers is Bozeman’s only local, independent video rental store, since 1984. Movie Lovers offers a vast collection of foreign, independent and classic films on DVD and Blu-Ray; as well as new releases and TV series. Movie Lovers is located at University Square on South 23rd Avenue. The friendly and knowledgeable staff offers great service and recommendations.   mp

To learn more about these summer family favorites and many others call Joe, Jim, Jill and The Kid at 406-586-0560.

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

ELSIE’S

TIPS

WRITTEN BY ELSIE JOHNSON

 

Q.  My daughter is bright, inquisitive, creative and caring, and she gets along equally well with peers and adults. But – even though her school provides a setting where she can follow her interests, manage her time, and ask for quiet space – her ability to get distracted continues to be a major barrier. How can we help her with her ADD? A.  Remember when Kermit the Frog would sing, “It’s not easy being green.” Well your daughter could just as easily sing, “It’s not easy being so easily distracted.” She has not asked to be the way she is, but getting the tools to succeed because of her way of thinking rather than despite it, is a challenge to her and all those who want her to be who she is and flourish.    I work primarily with people who have nonverbal (or picture-thinking) intelligence; I teach them to look through the lens of “picture-thinking” to understand, and take advantage of, their way of thinking. Keep in mind that 80 percent of us can picture ideas without picturing the words that represent them. The ideas in picture thinking may not flow in single images, but rather feel like intuition when 32 images a second are generated.   When the brain is receiving picture thinking, the ideas are prompted by confusion, boredom, fear or curiosity. Anything that’s happening in the environment can turn on the picturing. Consequently, attention is spread throughout the environment. This spread of attention is more a surplus of attention than a deficit. The surplus becomes a deficit when attention is unable to be limited to tasks.   Reminders to pay attention are fine, but they are like closing the barn door after the horse is gone.    To be more proactive and empowering, help your daughter realize that her wonderful brain was born ready to imagine, and imagines easily. This starts her management before the horse nudges its nose out the door. Feeling good about what’s happening is a start; understanding that she is the boss of her attention helps. Leaning how to turn off her imagination is a choice. Help her gain a stable orientation (a feeling of “being present”) and an understanding of the triggers (confusion, boredom, fear or curiosity) that turn on her imagination. Managing physical and mental energy and releasing stress are essential in controlling the surplus of attention that her imagination creates. Information is available online, by phone, in book form and through seminars I provide about how to take advantage of our natural way of thinking.   Though Kermit sang, “It’s not easy being green,” he loved himself and succeeded because of who he is.

Kundalini Yoga for the Whole Family! Kundalini & Hatha Yoga Pregnancy Yoga • Dancing For BirthTM Mommy & Me Yoga • Kids Yoga Yoga for Addiction Recovery Yoga for PTSD

Gloria “Ravi Inder” Overcash (406) 595-2547 blissfulfamilyyoga.com

mp

  Elsie Johnson, a Registered Educational Therapist, and certified DDAI Facilitator, has helped hundreds of adults and children gain control over their ability to learn, through understanding how to take advantage of their picture thinking – thus taking responsibility and pride in learning. Learn more at www.thelearningoptions.com or call Elsie at 406-282-7416.  

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51

Back To School Eye Exams!

Call Today! 522-8888

20|Twenty offers Bozeman a better way of looking at you with the newest and most comprehensive eyecare and eyewear practice in the Gallatin Valley. Make an appointment today with Dr. Sarah Hill or Dr. Sarah Kirkpatrick for all your family’s eyecare needs, and swing by our NEW location to check out our selection of the latest in fashion eyeware. Call today to schedule your childs eye exam. We look forward to seeing you!

As the longest standing OB/GYN practice in Bozeman, we are dedicated to providing comprehensive health care to women, including:

Caring for generation after generation since 1976

52

Tyler Bradford, MD

Stacy Shomento, MD

Fanee Freeman, MD

Samuel Sillitti, MD

Shelby Haugan, MD

Christene McDonnell, PA

Amy Korten, MD

Cassie Belzer, CNM, MSN

William Peters, MD

Lori Newman, CNM, FNP

September 2014 | mtparent.com

• Obstetrics

• Annual Physicals

• Reproductive Medicine & Fertility Care

• Female Continence Services

• Gynecology

• Menopause Management

• Gynecological Surgery

• Minimally Invasive Surgery • Midwifery • Nutrition • Diabetes Counseling

For more information or to make an appointment, call (406) 587-9202 or 1-866-587-9202 or visit bozemanobgyn.com 925 Highland Blvd, Suites 1210/1220 • Bozeman, MT Monday-Friday, 8 am to 4:45 pm

check here

each month for family

PHOTO E. KELLEY PHOTOGRAPHY

events, deals and coupons. get the latest from some of your favorite local businesses

Plus

Find even more

family events on our online calendars @mtparent.com & follow us on Facebook

advertisers & nonprofits may Submit what’s up events to [email protected]

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53

Y WHAT'S UP? Bozeman

THOMAS

FAMILY CHIROPRACTIC

YMCA

An all around family service to promote healthy living

Drs. Ali Schweitzer & Josh Prange offer: *Special Certifications in Pregnancy & Pediatric Care *Webster Technique Certification *Sport Rehab & Exercise Prescription *Craniosacral Therapy *Gentle adjustments for all ages Call to schedule an appointment

(406) 556-0307

www.thomasfamilychiropractic.com

Second Shot

Shoe Swap September 4, 2014

Got lots of cleats or dance shoes that are too small? Bring them to the Second Shot Shoe Swap on September 4 and trade them in for a size that fits. Even if you don’t need a pair of cleats or dance shoes to take home, bring yours as a donation and get entered in a raffle for two MSU football tickets to Montana State vs. Central Arkansas on September 13, 2014. The event will be held from 6-8 p.m. at the Gallatin Regional Park (Pavilions near the Dinosaur Park). Cleats or dance shoes may be dropped off at the YMCA office (514 S. 23rd) through September 3. Shoes must be dropped off prior to event day. Any shoes left at the end of the swap will be saved for future swaps. This event only includes cleats and dance shoes at this time. All shoes should be in good condition. The drawing for MSU football tickets will be held immediately following the swap. Need not be present to win. The winner will be contacted Friday, September 5.  mp

History Happened Here!

Gallatin History Museum

Employers Required to Provide Time and Space for Breastfeeding

Live Webinar September 4, 2014

Admission $5.00 & Children Under 12 Free. Located next door to the County Courthouse.

317 West Main Street Bozeman MT 59715 406-522-8122 www.gallatinhistorymuseum.org 54

September 2014 | mtparent.com

The Gallatin Breastfeeding Coalition, in partnership with Gallatin WIC and the Gallatin City-County Health Department, is happy to invite all business owners, managers and supervisors in Gallatin and Park counties for a live webinar addressing the new Federal requirements under FLSA that require employers to provide time and a private space for nursing employees.   Unravel the mystery with creative solutions from employers across the country on September 4 at 12 p.m. at the Gallatin City-County Health Department (215 W. Mendenhall). Questions and discussion will follow with a Certified Lactation Counselor.   Contact Melenie Duval at 406-582-3182 to register for this FREE webinar today.     mp

After School

BZN

Girl Scouts Seeks

Activities Roundup September 11, 2014

Montana Parent and the Gallatin Valley Mall are teaming up to provide an After School Activities Roundup at the Gallatin Valley Mall all on September 11 from 4-7 p.m. There are so many wonderful extracurricular activities available in our area – arts, crafts, drama, music, sports, etc. Come see them all under one roof. Not every kid is an athlete or an artist, but every kid deserves an after-school activity to help round them out, burn extra energy and stimulate their mind and creativity. This event will serve a dual purpose, enabling parents to book fun activities for PIR days. Take a walk through the Gallatin Valley Mall on September 11 and find out what peaks your child’s interest. You may discover something new. mp

Job Fair September 27, 2014

WRITTEN BY ELEONORE SNOW

For some parents, going back to work after staying home with kiddos can be scary and overwhelming and as a recently single mom going back to work after ten years, I get it. But for me, the scariest part of reentering the workforce has been the housework. Before I started working out of the home, the house was tidy, the refrigerator was full and the laundry was clean and folded. Often, the children could even find the results of some spontaneous baking on the counter. I was Martha-flippin’Stewart (minus the billion dollars). Now, I’m lucky if I can get the laundry washed before the cats pee in the hamper. Once it’s done, the children forage like cavemen for clean undies. But here’s the thing: Going back to work has boosted my self-esteem, opened up my world and actually benefitted our family. It’s not always easy—but that’s what makes it so rewarding. I have my own life; the kiddos have stepped up and become more self-reliant. And we’ve all learned to cherish the time we do have together a little bit more. At Montana Parent, we pass no judgment on whether you choose to work or not. We just want to provide our audience with an opportunity to either dip their toe into the workforce, or explore new job opportunities. Please join us for the Montana Parent/Gallatin Valley Mall Job Fair on September 27 from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. at the Gallatin Valley Mall. Exhibitors will be on hand with job opportunities, as well as demos on resume writing, dressing for success and mock interviews. mp

Leadership in Bozeman

Girl Scouts of Montana and Wyoming is in need of volunteers and troop leaders in Bozeman. Girl Scouts of Montana and Wyoming covers over 245,000 square miles, 79 counties and more than 128,000 girls who need positive role models in their lives. As a volunteer, you’ll introduce girls to new experiences that show them they’re capable of more than they ever imagined. You’ll be their supporter, guide and mentor, helping them develop skills and confidence that will last long after the meetings are over. Imagine the smiles, the excitement and the memories made – those are the moments you’ll share at Girl Scouts. Girl Scouts is the number one leadership organization for girls and women in the world. For more than a century, this premier leadership organization has been building girls of courage, confidence and character who make the world a better place. The girls of your community want to be a part of this amazing journey, but they need volunteers and troop leaders to guide them. Every girl has the ability to lead, but only one girl in five believes she can. A lack of role models, unhealthy images of beauty, peer pressure to fit in and a mean-girl culture are just some of the obstacles that stand between girls and their full potential. You can be the difference in bringing girls one step closer to breaking down those barriers. Volunteering opportunities with Girl Scouts are tailored to fit your schedule, your skills and your interests. Your time as a volunteer will provide girls with courage and vision to pursue whatever interests, causes and leadership roles are most important to them. With your support, girls will stand up, stand out and stand tall. Explore what being a volunteer could mean for you by signing up at www.gsmw.org.

Girl Scouts of Montana and Wyoming 800.736.5243 www.gsmw.org Headquarters, Billings Service Center 2303Grand Avenue Billings, MT 59102

JOIN THE

Casper Service Center 428 S. Durbin St. Suite 102 Casper, WY 82601 Great Falls Service Center 4930 Ninth Avenue South Great Falls, MT 59405

Our goal is to instill confidenc skills and a collaborative spirit In partnership with key to teaching them life lesson fun, imagination, and the joy o into everything we

800.736.5243 www.

For More Information Contact: Jessie Obee Community Development Manager [email protected] 800-736-5243 mp

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

55

BZN

Cinema Circus West 2014 Kid Critics ARTICLE & PHOTO PAULA K. BESWICK

The Bozeman Public Library Foundation will host the third annual Cinema Circus West on Saturday, September 13, 2014, with entertaining film shorts for kids accompanied by a festive circus for all ages. The first showing will be at 10 a.m. followed by the circus from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. with food vendors and a repeat afternoon film viewing immediately after the circus. Tickets for the films are free, but must be reserved in advance. Once again, we gathered Kid Critics to provide a quick preview of this year’s film shorts. Here is what our local Irving Elementary students had to say…

Mouse for Sale!: 7 thumbs up

James didn’t like when they teased the mouse, but liked when he connected with his owner. Miranda said the film made her feel happy because the mouse found an owner after being worried that he wouldn’t. Ellie echoed that feeling, especially since she had gotten pets from a pet store before. Overall, this film left the kids feeling that being teased is “not great.”

Ballet of the Unhatched of the Chicks: 6 thumbs up

Mozelle said, “The dancing chicks were really cute, but not much was going on.” Ellie, on the other hand said, “I liked it even though I’m personally not that big of a ballet fan.” Kaylie thought the film was artsy and creative, while Anna liked the music and dancing. All of them liked the cute chicks.   56

September 2014 | mtparent.com

Kid critics left to right: Mozelle Bertelsen age 9.5; Kaylie Van Coller 10; Anna Toth 9.5, Miranda Hall 9; Eleanor (Ellie) Cornish 9; James Cornish 8 (behind Ellie); and Michael Toth 6.

Slap Back Jack: 3 thumbs down, but 4 up

Mozelle and Kaylie were both a bit “creeped out” by the animations and sounds, but Anna liked it and gave it a 5-star rating. She thought it was creative and, “liked how the older man was the problem solver instead of a young super hero – you need to listen to your elders.”  

Tally Ho, Pancake: 6 thumbs up and 1 down

This one got a thumbs down from our harshest Kid Critic, James. James really didn’t like the graphics, claiming they were the “worst ever.” Contrast that with Anna who really liked it and could tell it was from another country, which she thought was cool. The theme of friendship and everyone working together was appealing to the group.  

Bobble & Squeek: 5 thumbs up and 2 down

With a lot of giggling, Michael liked the noises. Miranda gave it 3 stars because she liked the look of the blobs and dubbed it “super funny.” Ellie also gave it 3 stars because it was cute, even though she wasn’t clear on what was going on until the end.

Story Tree: 5 thumbs up and 2 down

Everyone wanted to talk about this film. James started us off with the astute observation that, “The people look like they had gone through a ridiculous machine that made their faces fatter. The dude was just weird.” Kaylie added that while she gave it 4 stars, she didn’t really understand the plot. Mozelle thought the film was creative with the books like leaves, and Ellie loves books so she liked it. Anna gave it 2 stars because the plot was confusing; while Miranda liked that the boy was reading books.  

Diversity: 3 thumbs up and 4 down

Michael, our intrepid 6-year-old said, “I liked it because it was funny!” Anna liked it because it taught a lesson to always be nice to people, “It’s fun to be nice.” Kaylie thought the characters were fine, but the lesson is one most people know, so she wasn’t quite as impressed. Ellie gave it 3 stars because while it was pretty entertaining and she liked the lesson, she thinks the lesson of being nice is taught quite a lot.  mp

Paula K. Beswick is the foundation director for the Bozeman Public Library Foundation.

BZN

Halloween Costume Swap October 4, 2014

Montana Parent will host the Fourth Annual Kids’ Halloween Costume Swap in Bozeman, at the Gallatin Valley Mall on October 4 from 10 a.m.-noon. Bring your clean, gently used children’s Halloween costumes from year’s past and exchange them for others. Just imagine, your girl can be a princess for the fourth year in a row, but this year she’ll don a new (to her) gown – for free. For every costume you donate, you are eligible to exchange it for a new, gently used one. Even if you don’t plan to exchange, we will accept costume donations. Please bring costumes to the Gallatin Valley Mall office in Bozeman during business hours. Depending on inventory, we will provide costumes to anyone who cannot afford one. This free event is presented to you by Montana Parent, Giggles Toys and More and The Gallatin Valley Mall.

Bozeman BPW Celebration Event

October 22, 2014

The Bozeman Business and Professional Women (BPW) will celebrate the efforts and successes of local women on October 22 at the Baxter Hotel, from 6-8 p.m. This event is free and open to the public.

mp

Dee-O-Gee is Moving

The celebration includes networking, pampering, door prizes, food, wine and a celebratory program. This year’s speaker is Carmen McSpadden from MSU. Carmen is the Director of the MSU Leadership Institute and MSU Leadership Fellows Program. She will be speaking on “Women Working Together”, reinforcing their oneness.

Soon (sometime this month) you’ll be able to find all of the great Dee-O-Gee products and services you’ve come to love (plus, a few more) on 19th Street in Bozeman. The original (8th and Main) location will relocate next to the new Cold Smoke Coffeehouse, adjacent to Buffalo Wild Wings. At this new location, you’ll find:  »»Dog day care services in our new Indoor Dog Park (pending City Commission approval) »»Expanded nutrition and supplements section »»An award-winning full-service dog grooming salon »»Self-service dog wash, just like the facility at Dee-O-Gee in Downtown Bozeman »»More convenient parking than 8th and Main »»More room for kennels, cat trees and “big” pet care items

This well-attended social event is designed to congratulate women in the workplace, publicize achievements of women in the business community and spread the word about Bozeman BPW programs and activities.

mp

Bozeman BPW is a diverse group of over 140 professional women working to ensure that women in the Gallatin Valley have the tools to succeed. Members come together for regular meetings where they pool their talents and resources to create innovated professional, educational and networking opportunities for women. Bozeman BPW is licensed by the Business and Professional Women Foundation, a national organization that was founded in 1919 and remains one of this country’s largest organizations for working women. For more information on the celebration event and sponsorship information, contact Donna Kelsch, 480-773-8386, [email protected]. mp

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

57

BZN Loyalty Benefits!

We’ve moved, but we’re still available for anything for your hair & makeup . . . you are always our #1 priority. Use Schedulicity.com or phone for an appointment. Receive a free loyalty gift with any styling/product purchase. Call for address & info! 582-5427 | AntoinettesStudio.com

Are there more fights and arguments? Kids stressed out? You stressed out? These are normal life stressors/changes or may be the result of a mental illness.

Tri Therapy can help!

Dr. Donna Kelsch has been a therapist for 28 years and now has a full time practice serving clients in Bozeman, Belgrade, Livingston and Manhattan.

Dr. Kelsch is also qualified to do socio-emotional and cognitive assessments Call today for a free phone consultation. Office: 406-404-1009 Mobile: 480-773-8386 TriTherapyMT.com • [email protected] 804 N 19th Avenue, Bozeman, MT 59718

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

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September 2014 | mtparent.com

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Outdoor Festival September 27, 2014

Helena area kids and parents, do you want to learn how to effectively use bear repellent spray? Paddle a raft or kayak? Ride a mountain bike? Catch a fish? If this sounds like fun, come to the free Helena Outdoors Festival on Saturday, September 27 from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. The festival will be held at Spring Meadow Lake State Park (off Country Club Road) and the Montana WILD education center (2668 Broadwater Avenue). You can access the festival from either location.

Your donations will help fund the hundreds of local families that Algeria Shrine supports. These men and women have touched the lives of many women in the Moms Club by helping their children walk with ease.

Montana Fish, Wildlife & Parks sponsors the festival, in cooperation with local partners including the U.S. Forest Service, Helena Bicycle Club, U.S. Department of Agriculture, Montana Discovery Foundation, Adventures Unlimited, Capital Sports and Walleye Unlimited.

If you have any questions contact Corina Maher, MOMS Club President, at 760-885-7139.

mp

September 2014 | mtparent.com

MOMS Club is a local nonprofit group of women who provide support to other mothers and their families, are invested in the community and work toward finding creative ways to give back. The Trunk or Treat Spooktacular is both a fun community event and a fundraiser for the Algeria Shrine Temple of Helena.

The Helena Outdoors Festival provides an opportunity for kids and families to participate in a variety of hands-on learning activities addressing rafting, kayaking, fishing, archery, mountain biking, simulated laser target shooting, bear awareness and safety and more.

For more information call Montana WILD at 406-444-9944. 60

The Moms Club of Helena will host the 2014 Trunk or Treat Spooktacular on October 4 from 12-4 p.m. at Centennial Park in Helena. This free community event will include a car show where children can trick or treat from the trunks of cars, a costume swap, bounce houses, costume contests, a pumpkin carving contest, face painting, vendor displays and much, much more.

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Mama’s Got a New Bag

Contest PHOTOS, PRIZES & TEXT | SAMMY FARMER

ENTER to WIN!

Go to our blog www.mtparent.com/blog to enter to win this bag and all the prizes! This contest ends September 30, 2014. Check back for a new contest every month. Follow us on Facebook for more information. Want to be featured in the next bag? Email [email protected].

Maranda Lee Designs

Stella Medium – ‘Gotcha’ print in grey accented with a vibrant deep purple Value: $78 marandalee.com  

20Twenty Eyecare

Comprehensive Eye Health Examination Value: $140 20TwentyMT.com  

Buckaroo Organics Skin Care Gift Set Value: $102 buckaroo-organics.com 


Blue Jay Bakery Gift Certificate Value: $75
 bluejaybakery.com/  

Meridian Boutique Echo Starburst Scarf Value: $39 meridianboutique.com   

Dee-O-Gee

Gift Certificate
 Value: $25
 dee-o-gee.com mp

Livingston

NEW PEDIATRICIAN Introducing Dr. Heather DiCross

“Becoming a pediatrician in a small community where I get the opportunity to know the children who are my patients and to watch them grow up is exactly where I have envisioned myself.” - Dr. Heather DiCross

406-222-0800 | LivingstonHealthCare.org 62

September 2014 | mtparent.com

Shopping Directory Check out the newest R+F products and find

Feature of the

month

out how the Doctors are changing skin and changing lives!

jessicamariedehn@ gmail.com

Thursday, September 18th

Bozeman, MT 406-581-5525

Ph & Txt: (406) 570‐2839 

Cold smoke Coffee on 19th Ave. Two times: 1pm and 7pm (kids welcome) 

Jessica Dehn

  Hi, I’m Nancy Hutchinson. I was introduced to essential oils seven years ago, and loved the idea of having natural health solutions. However, I did not have all the information I needed and wanted on how to use them. I finally found the company doTERRA, and started to connect with people and resources that were so helpful. I truly love these oils for all of their amazing capabilities and how richly they have blessed my family and friends. I believe everyone can benefit from these oils in their everyday lives. I have my doctorate degree in Physical Therapy and am passionate about teaching people how to improve their health. Offering these classes allows me to give back what I had been craving for years…how to empower yourself with knowledge and good health. I hope to meet each of you soon.  

WEB: MySilpada.com/Kate.Bryan 

September Class Schedule

SEPT 2: ESSENTIAL OILS FOR BACK TO SCHOOL    6-7 P.M.    FARM BUREAU BLDG. (502 S 19TH, BOZEMAN) SEPT 3: BY APPOINTMENT IN HELENA SEPT 4: INTRODUCTION TO ESSENTIAL OILS   7-8 P.M.   FARM BUREAU BLDG. BOZEMAN SEPT 10: BY APPOINTMENT IN HELENA

406-579-0746 [email protected]

SEPT 11: NATURAL CLEANING MAKE & TAKE (BRING A SPRAY BOTTLE) 6-7 P.M.  FARM BUREAU BLDG. BOZEMAN SEPT 15: ESSENTIAL OILS FOR MOOD AND PAIN MANAGEMENT 7-8 P.M. FARM BUREAU BLDG. BOZEMAN SEPT 17-21: DOTERRA GLOBAL CONVENTION IN SALT LAKE CITY, UT SEPT 24: BY APPOINTMENT IN HELENA SEPT 25: MAKING AN INCOME WITH DOTERRA   7-8 P.M. FARM BUREAU BLDG. BOZEMAN

 

Can’t make it to one of the classes listed above? Don’t live in Bozeman or Helena but still interested in learning about oils? Call me 406-570-6390, and we can set up a small class (four to six people) by appointment for me to come to you.    Join us on Facebook as well at www.facebook.com/everydayhealthandwellnesswithnancy for tips and WEEKLY GIVEAWAYS as well as updated class information.

To advertise in the shopping directory contact Cora Desantis 406-579-0746 or [email protected] Cost is $125 per month

mp

:: SEPTEMBER ACTIVITY & EVENT CALENDARS + BLOG + MORE @ MTPARENT.COM ::

September 2014 | mtparent.com

63

School is in session! William Allen, MD

Board Certified in Pediatrics

406-414-5700

bdhg.org/peds

BACK TO SCHOOL! Get your kids’ school year started off right with these helpful tips: • • •

Make sure they are up to date on all immunizations and check-ups. Read the school’s lunch schedule or pack their own to ensure a healthy lunch. Get plenty of sleep and stick to a schedule.

• •

•

Make sure your kids’ school has your upto-date emergency contact information. Make sure their backpack isn’t too heavy, no more than 10-20% of their body weight. Have their vision and hearing checked.

The doctors at Bozeman Deaconess Pediatrics want your kids to enjoy a safe and healthy school year! If it’s time for a check-up, call us today.

William Allen, MD :: Michael Blake, MD, PhD :: Juliet Hansen, MD Pepper Henyon, MD :: Mark Hodgson, MD :: Angie Ostrowski, MD